Chapter 116: Coach, I Want To Write Novels
What grudge and what resentment is this?
Qi Luo An has been out of the industry for eight years, and they’re still chasing her down, huh.
“You’d have to ask her about that.”
However, Yu Wei could tell from Shen Yutong’s words that the two of them had a pretty good relationship, otherwise she wouldn’t call her so affectionately.
Thinking about it carefully, Yu Wei didn’t seem to have ever called her that way…
Something like Qiqi, Luoluo, An An, reduplicated words, disgusting, better not to call her that.
The program recording officially began. For this episode, the program team didn’t pull any gimmicks; it was the familiar rules and familiar routine, taking turns to pick blind boxes.
Yu Wei spotted the label on the green blind box at a glance: “Coach, I want to write a novel.” Was this one of his readers, or a colleague?
Would there really be a web novel author with nothing better to do coming to participate in a singing variety show?
Meng Han, just recovered from a minor illness, got the priority pick right. The athlete from last time had worn him out, so this time he chose one related to calligraphy.
Practicing calligraphy should be much more relaxing, right?
When it was Yu Wei’s turn, he casually picked the novel blind box. The other blind boxes had no direct relation to him, and he couldn’t tell if they were fans; this one interested him the most.
He actually kind of hoped it was a colleague. Dealing with singers and idols in the entertainment industry every day, he somewhat missed the days of a bunch of failures getting together to brag.
The old days passed very slowly, and failure writing was also very slow…
Su Xinnan liked small animals, so she picked “Animal Protection Association.” Shen Yutong’s “Roads have a million ways” didn’t have much to say about it, since there were no other choices anyway.
Perhaps Yu Wei’s curtain-tearing behavior from the previous episode caught the program team’s attention; this time the curtain dropped very quickly.
Yu Wei’s blind box contestant was a round-faced guy wearing black-rimmed glasses, looking a bit shy, as if he wasn’t used to being stared at by so many people.
This temperament really might be a colleague…
He’d met with colleagues face-to-face before; that hesitant, shrinking, forced-calm, looking-around vibe was spot on.
Meng Han drew a spirited old man, a somewhat famous calligrapher. Just standing there, he had a unique aura, looking even more energetic than the glasses guy.
After heavy metal rock and back-kitchen rock, Teacher Meng was trying grandpa rock now…
Su Xinnan’s and Shen Yutong’s blind box civilians were a pet shop boss and a traffic cop respectively. Sister Nan liking small animals was fine, but Shen Yutong was in for a rough episode.
In the scorching summer sun, a traffic cop’s job definitely wasn’t easy.
“Congratulations to all guests and civilian friends for successfully teaming up. Over the next few days, you will pair up and enter the observation period, and finally the celebrity observers will choose a suitable song for each other.”
“Looking forward to everyone’s music!”
For the fifth episode, the program team was a bit too honest, following the process from start to finish, not only no gimmicks, but even the interlude lines were straight from the original script.
If they hadn’t already shot four episodes, Yu Wei would almost think the variety show had just started. Given the program team’s mannerism, they were probably secretly brewing something big.
Taking advantage of the filming break, Yu Wei proactively greeted the civilian little brother. He was called Hu Xing, claiming to be a web novel enthusiast.
Enthusiast? Could there even be enthusiasts for this stuff?
Readers are readers, authors are authors; what category is enthusiast? Got it—wants to write but too lazy to pick up the pen, or tried but failed to sign.
No wonder it’s called “I want to write a novel”; turns out it’s just purely wanting to write, hasn’t even started…
“Yu Ju, can you teach me to write novels?”
This form of address was unique to the web novel circle: whatever Ju, whatever God, whatever Big Shot. During Yu Wei’s failure years, these were the phrases he heard the most.
“Academic impropriety. Since they’re addressing a colleague, it must be the pen name.”
“Sorry, Gu Shen.”
Actually, Yu Wei’s words instead eased some of Hu Xing’s nervousness. Colleague to colleague was definitely much closer than star to civilian.
The two chatted idly for a bit, and Hu Xing briefly introduced his situation. He had just graduated this year and originally wanted to find a job like his classmates, but got caught in the whirlpool of his parents’ suggestions to take the postgraduate exam or civil servant exam.
He was the kind of truly ordinary person: family background not great, but not to the point of not being able to put food on the table.
Double non-elite regular undergrad, no advantage from education, no experience hustling in society, no rebellious youth enjoyed, but being obedient didn’t push his grades further either.
“So, what does this have to do with writing books?”
“I want to do something I truly like, like writing stories. I’ve loved reading novels since I was little, fantasizing all sorts of plots…”
“OK.”
As an old failure, Yu Wei understood this feeling too well. This situation wasn’t unique; basically every book lover had creation ideas.
Some took action, some backed off, and some were like Hu Xing—wanting but not really, unwilling to give up.
On a whim, they’d search everywhere how to become an author; when the enthusiasm cooled and they saw what they’d written, they’d silently delete it…
Really lost, they’d want to pick it up again, repeating over and over: intermittent creation, continuous quitting the circle.
Hu Xing was like a student being scolded, subconsciously shrinking his head, wanting to hear what teachings Yu Wei had for him.
“Sigh.”
Yu Wei felt that no matter what he said next, this kid would nod along, but afterward, he still wouldn’t have understood a thing.
It felt like life was full of such people everywhere: introverted, dull, three-minute enthusiasm, extremely good at internal hype—commonly known as having thought up a lot of stories.
Like those who write ten thousand words of worldview and then start with a hook…
“You, have you tried writing?”
“I tried in freshman year, wrote three chapters and gave up.” Hu Xing looked a bit embarrassed. “In junior year I tried again, persisted to thirty thousand words but still couldn’t sign.”
Entry into the industry failed; many newcomers got stuck at this step.
Yu Wei, as a failure, didn’t have much to preach about. Just couldn’t pass this step, and basically no fate with web novels.
It wasn’t about signing or not, but whether willing to put in the effort: blindly writing, blindly trying; even on no-threshold platforms, couldn’t persist.
“Tried internal submissions? You can find the official editors’ emails.”
Actually, for impatient newcomers, Yu Wei recommended internal submissions. Though the pass rate was low for newbies, the time investment was little, no need to wait till thirty thousand words to die.
Editors who replied fast would template-reject in half an hour, no evaluation or advice, formulaic rejection…
“Tried, all template rejections, told me to check the rankings.”
“And then?”
Then Hu Xing mumbled incoherently, unable to speak. Yu Wei could roughly guess: he definitely checked the rankings, but probably still didn’t get it.
Many newcomers were like this: seeing those long, convoluted book titles on the rankings and thinking them tacky, not to their taste; trying to learn the Big Shots’ premium two- or four-character titles but failing to sign.
Actually, setting goals lower wasn’t bad. Always thinking of writing a masterpiece— no wonder they failed. Yu Wei was like that at first; after trying a few times, he got used to it.
Perhaps sensing the awkward atmosphere, Hu Xing proactively chimed in: “I’ve been reading your books lately, Gu Shen, learned a lot.”
“Like?”
“Uh, talent won’t be buried.”
Learned jack squat. If really wanting to learn web novel writing, analyze entry points and rhythm. Talent and prose? Not important for newcomers.
Now readers skim ten lines at a glance and still find it tiring; who cares about your prose? As long as the story is clear, that’s good enough.
“I also learned the golden three chapters…”
Perhaps seeing Yu Wei’s odd expression, Hu Xing quickly added: “Protagonist, golden finger, conflict, and such.”
Still on golden three chapters?
Golden three chapters was just a handy popular term. Web novels used templates, but not that rigidly boxed.
At least Yu Wei didn’t blindly believe in it. As long as the opening was interesting, even full of protagonist inner thoughts, people would read on.
“I don’t know much else, but if you want to write entertainment novels, I can teach you.”
Yu something-or-other, not talented, but a failure in the entertainment field.
“Want, want.”
Actually, Hu Xing hadn’t read many entertainment novels, but with Yu Wei, an entertainment industry pro, teaching him, it would definitely be twice the result with half the effort.
Fast-forward to twice the effort with half the result…
With the program recording officially beginning, Yu Wei followed Hu Xing to his rented study space. The place was fairly tidy, just the desk a bit messy.
Various postgraduate and civil servant exam materials piled up nearby, just like his aimless future; even he didn’t know what kind of person he wanted to become.
After graduating, still carrying family expectations and striving, while peers were all going to work, but he was forced to live off parents—this life was actually very painful.
Especially when he wanted to give up, but parents brushed it off with “you’re so smart”…
If writing could help him find a new direction in life, that wouldn’t be bad.
The photographers tactfully didn’t film others’ life details, instead focusing the camera shot on Hu Xing’s computer.
They were also curious what kind of story Hu Xing could write under Yu Wei’s guidance.
“Entertainment openings are pretty important, right?”
Hu Xing didn’t know much about writing, but he’d read a few entertainment novels and knew the rough plot design and refresh points.
“A good gimmick and entry point is enough.”
Gimmick attracts, entry point develops the story. Take Yu Wei’s book “Why Does the Star Care So Much About Ratings?”—gimmick is ratings, entry point is how the lowest-rated star counterattacks.
Hu Xing nodded as if he understood, then froze for a long time without starting.
He got the reasons, but couldn’t come up with any… Parallel entertainment was just plagiarist stuff; how to think of a gimmick.
Entry points weren’t all bottom-tier singing competition starts?
“Any ideas?”
Yu Wei was waiting for him to start writing the new book opening so he could go write some words himself; stuck at the first step wouldn’t do.
“Can I go crazy and do abstract?”
“That trend is over, child.”
The web novel market was still very competitive. By the time you saw an idea blowing up, it was too late to follow.
Yu Wei casually opened the website on his computer. The recent new book list didn’t show much; flipping back further, the previous hot one was going crazy.
Madman persona was actually pretty good, but with Hu Xing’s rigid personality, hard to write interestingly. Live-action style feared no action.
Further back was the “system came too early” craze: doomsday, romance, entertainment all had it, not fresh…
“Got it.”
Web novels’ essence was old bottle new wine. Who said this routine was old? This routine was great; add some stuff and it could still work.
Could only say Yu Wei sucked at other things, but failure ideas came right out of his mouth.
“My Daughter Is the Future Heavenly Queen.” It was an ordinary afternoon; my daughter, learning addition subtraction multiplication division, suddenly asked me, “Daddy, what is a Heavenly Queen system?”
System came too early, but milk dad stream.
“Can it be like that?”
Hu Xing had actually read some kid-raising entertainment, but the basic routine was taking the child to find mom, using the kid to flirt with girls; he felt it greasy and didn’t get into it.
Daughter’s system came too early—felt like it could really work.
“Good is good, but I haven’t raised kids…”
“It’s writing a novel; just make it up.”
Seeing him still hesitating, Yu Wei simply typed a book title in, occupy the name first, write or not could be considered slowly.
The moment he confirmed the book title, the familiar virtual panel surprisingly appeared again.
[Detected new book “My Daughter Is the Future Heavenly Queen.” Bind?]
?
Yu Wei’s system appeared when he finished writing the book title; today filling in a book title, it popped up again.
Seemed like the system never said it could only bind one book…
