Chapter 189:
Xie Wanning was pressed quite comfortably, squinting her eyes and letting out a soft sigh.
Lu Ziyan saw her thoughts and smiled again, “Actually, I massaged you before too.”
“？？？” Xie Wanning lifted her eyes to look at him, puzzled, “When?”
“When?” This question seemed to stump him, and he paused before saying, “Wanwan, when I said I would serve you thoroughly, did you think I was lying?”
In those two years, every night she fell asleep first after he demanded from her, he handled the aftermath very well.
Except for the finger marks and kiss marks on her body that couldn’t be erased, when had he ever let her wake up feeling uncomfortable.
It was only yesterday when his passion surged that he truly neglected it.
Xie Wanning vaguely understood something and fell silent.
The previous him was like a gourd that kept everything bottled up, bearing everything on his own and never revealing his feelings.
Ten parts of affection, he would only show one part, and even that one part was hidden away.
Sometimes she could feel it, but more often, she couldn’t.
Thinking back now, many of the things between them in her past life were misunderstandings that shouldn’t have happened.
If… if he hadn’t been so arbitrary, if he had considered her feelings more, they wouldn’t have had such a tragic end…
Xie Wanning was silent for a long time, then suddenly reached out to wrap her arms around his waist and called his name.
Lu Ziyan stiffened for a moment, then gave a low hum.
Xie Wanning said, “Don’t go crazy like that anymore, and don’t touch Pei Yuqing. I’ll try to love you again.”
“……Alright,” Lu Ziyan buried his face in her hair, his voice a bit muffled, “Wanwan…”
“Hm?”
“Can you kiss me?” He took her hand and placed it on his chest, “You can bite me too.”
He had always wanted her to take the initiative and leave a mark on him, but it had never happened.
Instead, that sickly person could flaunt the bite mark she left on him right in front of Lu Ziyan.
For nearly a year, he would often recall that bite mark, like a rat in the gutter, constantly imagining their loving sweetness.
……How intense must their lovemaking have been for her to bite so hard.
He, who had suffered countless injuries and was numb to pain, still ached unbearably at that sight, so in her past life, how much pain must she have felt seeing the red marks on Liu Manrou’s body.
Many memories Lu Ziyan didn’t even dare to revisit, as the overwhelming regret could swallow him whole, splitting him into different versions of himself.
The self that hated him laughed happily, these were all what you deserved, just experiencing her feelings from back then firsthand, a taste of your own medicine.
The self addicted to jealousy boiled with killing intent, wanting to dismember every man who had touched her, tried to defile her, or caught her eye.
He sometimes hated himself clearly, sometimes hated indiscriminately all the men who wanted to take her from him, especially that sickly person.
Let him go?
No no no, he deserved to die the most!
Lu Ziyan gave a miserable laugh; he could never forget that they had worshiped heaven and earth and consummated their marriage.
As long as that sickly person lived, he could never feel at ease in this life!
He tightened his hold on the young lady in his arms and asked her softly, “Can you kiss me?”
Xie Wanning: “……”
She could harden her resolve and refuse his threats and coercion, and face his gloomy and stern face without fear, but Lu Ziyan burying his head in her neck, softly begging her like this—she had truly never seen it.
No threats, no ferocity; the aloof and proud man who was above it all placed himself in the inferior position in their affection, awaiting her giving.
