Chapter 177: Multiverse Prelude! Ian’s Horse Stumbles!
In the void.
Thor was carrying two unconscious bodies—one was his father Odin, whose soul was temporarily trapped in the body of Loki, the Frost Giant King.
The other was naturally Loki, the Frost Giant King. This enemy was currently using the body of the Asgardian King of Gods, but he was also in a state of unconsciousness.
“Does this thing look like an exit?” Thor didn’t know how long he had searched in the void, but he finally found the only place that looked like an exit in this void.
It was a colossal door suspended in mid-air, looking truly out of place.
There was no light, no sound, no up or down, no time. Only floating fragments of faint light, like cosmic dust, slowly rotating in absolute silence.
And in the center of this dead silence, a door actually stood. It was difficult not to make Thor wonder if the exit to this mysterious dimension was beyond the door.
“Is this damn door really an exit?” Thor tapped the colossal bronze door suspended in the void with Mjolnir. The ancient runes on the door flickered with a faint white light and quickly extinguished.
It was as if Thor hadn’t used the right key. As he pondered whether to use Mjolnir to give the door a “forceful breakthrough,” he suddenly heard a familiar whistling sound from behind him.
“Whoosh whoosh whoosh~~~”
What a reassuring sound.
If it hadn’t carried a killing intent, Thor would have shouted, “Uncle Gungnir, you saved me!” But now, Thor sensed a killing intent in this familiar whistling sound.
“Is Gungnir going to shoot me?!”
Thor turned around sharply, only to see a golden light tear through the void, heading straight for him! His pupils instantly contracted to the size of needle points. In 0.01 seconds, Thor’s regretful Asgardian brain flashed through countless possibilities.
Was Loki controlling my father’s body to kill me?
Or did my unconscious father can’t stand my stupidity and wants to clean house?
It couldn’t be that Gungnir had developed a rebellious heart!
“No!!”
Thor cried out in utter horror. The familiar white light pierced the void and shot towards him. The target didn’t seem to be his heart but his most vulnerable buttocks!
As the Crown Prince of Asgard, no one knew the power of this spear better than Thor.
For a moment, Thor’s heart trembled. However, he didn’t have time to think too much before Gungnir, with its sharp killing intent, was already upon him.
“Ian Kent!?”
Thor only had time to see the youth riding Gungnir. Terrified, he threw both “fathers” off his shoulders. However, Gungnir was not attracted by food offered.
Its target was still Thor’s backside. Thor hastily dodged the first wave of attack with a lazy roll, only to trip himself and scramble wildly on the ground with his hands and feet.
“Don’t come any closer! Don’t come any closer! Thor, who you watched grow up!”
Thor wailed as he crawled.
Although the first strike didn’t hit, the value of Gungnir was unquestionable.
With a sharp turn, it abruptly changed direction in mid-air. The spearhead, flashing with Runic runes that guaranteed a hit, reached its destination at a tricky angle.
“Pfft!”
Hit the target precisely!
“Ahhhhhh~ My Asgardian divine buttocks!!” Thor’s screams echoed in the void. He twitched his limbs like a frog pinned to a specimen board.
Of course.
That full-throated cry was perhaps the proof that he had the least to fear for his life among all the targets hit by Gungnir. Ian’s judgment had been flawless.
The only deviation.
Was that Ian hadn’t expected to be unable to intercept Gungnir at the last moment, as if Gungnir was determined to uphold its reputation of never missing.
“A slight miscalculation.”
Ian Kent landed with a flourish. He glanced at the pathetic Thor and immediately assumed a rescue pose, pretending to be a victim himself, a pitiful evil god who had been waylaid by Gungnir.
“Don’t panic! I’ll help you! This damned divine artifact is too evil! It ambushed me and is now ambushing my follower!” After speaking, he grabbed the spear shaft and pulled hard.
“Ooooooowwwww!!”
Thor’s tears streamed from the pain.
“No! Don’t pull! Don’t pull!”
Thor wailed again. He felt as if his soul had been torn apart. He clutched his bleeding backside, tears welling up in his eyes uncontrollably.
His gaze towards Ian was filled with the accusation of being re-injured.
“No… this time I swear, the barbs on the spearhead grew on their own.” Ian looked awkwardly at Gungnir, which was still dripping blood in his hand.
He felt that Gungnir might be holding a personal grudge.
The suffering of the Crown Prince of Asgard has been long.
Seeing Thor’s bleeding backside, Ian, in a moment of inspiration, pulled out medical supplies from his four-dimensional pocket and rushed forward, applying them directly to Thor’s backside.
“Ultra-thin and breathable, strong absorption, peaceful sleep all night… My deskmate uses this brand of hemostatic bandage, it’s really good, not a hint of false advertising.”
Ian contributed all the remaining hemostatic artifacts he had, showing a genuine sense of guilt. He wouldn’t normally be willing to offer such divine artifacts to help.
The props were indeed not valuable.
But the usage ideas of a prodigy were priceless.
The saying that creativity is most valuable in the 21st century was not only said by Ian and MacArthur. The theft of crystallized wisdom meant an infringement of intellectual property rights.
“This is…” Thor trembled as he touched the sticker on his backside. A band-aid? Is this a band-aid! I’ve lived on Earth for a long time and know a lot of common sense!
“Don’t try to fool me, this is a kitchen item used to absorb moisture from live fish before frying them…” Thor said, covering his band-aid-covered backside and looking at Ian with a wistful gaze.
He felt like Ian was treating him as an ingredient.
At the same time.
He also knew that he had once again been “tempered” by the evil god. Because he dared not speak out, Thor could only stare at Ian’s captivating eyes with his two Asgardian little eyes.
“Oh, right, our New Justice League has trauma subsidies. Wait a moment, I’ll channel some magic power to you…” With that, Ian shared some magic power with Thor.
“This is shared divine power. I can use it, but the ownership doesn’t belong to me…” Thor had clearly been in Ian’s organization for a long time and had developed some faith.
“Uh, that’s not important.”
Ian coughed awkwardly, looking at Thor’s resentful gaze, and quickly changed the subject.
“Ahem, hey, Thor, this place seems bigger than your home. Have you found an exit yet?” Ian indeed didn’t know how to leave this void.
Hearing this.
Thor didn’t answer. He simply raised his other trembling hand and pointed to the super large door not far away, which anyone with eyes could see clearly.
“Is this the exit you found?” Ian pretended to have just regained his sight and used the opportunity to bypass the resentful Thor, walking towards the suspended door.
【 Encountered unknown radiation, Berserker Experience Points +9】
【 Encountered unknown radiation, Berserker Experience Points +9】
【 Encountered unknown radiation, Berserker Experience Points +9】
……
It was obvious.
The door standing here was not harmless. It was emitting a very strong radiation, even satisfying Ian’s upgrade needs.
“I bet anyone normal would immediately turn into a radiant being with a lifespan of a blooming flower if they stood here for a moment,” Ian exclaimed softly as he approached the ancient, awe-inspiring door.
【 Encountered unknown radiation, Berserker Experience Points +11】
【 Encountered unknown radiation, Berserker Experience Points +11】
【 Encountered unknown radiation, Berserker Experience Points +11】
……
The door might not look appetizing, but it was definitely a leveling-up tool. The “radiation” it emitted was continuously providing him with Berserker Experience Points!
Ian excitedly pondered whether he could move the door back to his lair, thus bidding farewell to the trouble of manual leveling. Thor, limping, also walked over.
“Why didn’t you answer my prayer? I called you over three hundred times!” Thor, clutching his backside, walked laboriously to Ian’s side and asked him in an accusatory tone.
Ian’s gaze began to wander.
He looked at the 【 Unread Messages 】 in his brain. Of course, he couldn’t tell Thor that he had forgotten to check his prayers, as this would damage the omnipotence expected of an evil god.
For this reason.
Ian’s brain whirred slightly.
“Mainly because I’ve recently become religious myself. I’m a devout Christian. Every time I encounter a believer’s prayer, I seriously consider—what would God do?”
“Although I’m an evil god, I’m a legitimate evil god, so I have to imitate God’s style and can’t act recklessly.” He scratched his head and put on a “pious” expression.
His hands gestured chaotically in front of his chest. These shoddy gestures wouldn’t fool anyone on Earth, but they would leave aliens bewildered.
“God? You want to benchmark yourself against God?” Thor was stunned, completely bewildered, and focused on the astonishment that an evil god would have such “lofty” ambitions.
“Why not? I know all his ultimate moves—playing dead + going offline, very effective.” Ian shrugged, looking as if it were natural, even a little proud.
He hadn’t been struck by lightning yet, which proved God’s might had not reached this side of the Marvel Universe. Therefore, he felt he could take this opportunity to harshly criticize God of the DC Universe in the Marvel Universe.
As for what would happen if God of the Marvel Universe came looking for him… God of the Marvel Universe was merely a Skyfather. Ian was also a Skyfather. Rounding it off, his criticism was just encouragement to a peer.
It was the truth!
No one could find fault with Master Ian!
“You win.”
Thor found that his vocabulary lacked words to refute Ian’s logic. He could only give a thumbs-up and then walked aside to heal his injuries with divine power.
“What is this?” Ian was studying how to take the door away. He couldn’t directly put it into his dimension, as if his dimension couldn’t bear its weight.
The mysterious door was definitely a treasure!
Ian, firmly believing this, stood before the magnificent mysterious door, his gaze sharp, staring intently at the constantly flowing and rearranging runes and lines on the door.
Those patterns and lines were constantly changing. With every blink, they would outline a different image than the last, as if possessing life and changing every moment.
One moment it looked like a lush forest, the next it transformed into a rushing galaxy; in another instant, it became the faces of countless beings wailing, laughing, being born, and dying.
It was as if it wasn’t depicting all things, but was the projection of all things itself, the materialization of cosmic law. One look, and the soul seemed to be drawn into it.
Merging with this endless change.
“Did you figure anything out? Do you know how to open the door?” Thor, finding his injuries difficult to heal, limped back to Ian’s side, carrying the two “fathers” again.
He noticed that Ian had been staring at the door for a long time.
“Even my cat knows how to open a strange door,” Ian snapped back to his senses and walked forward to demonstrate to the common-sense-lacking Thor.
“To get someone to open a door, you naturally have to knock first,” Ian said, knocking and shouting into the door as if he were wandering through the streets.
“Is anyone home? Is anyone there?”
Ian knocked frantically and asked loudly.
“Knock knock knock!”
The crisp knocking sound echoed in the void.
Thor opened his mouth, about to say, “I tried it, it didn’t work,” when suddenly—he froze.
He saw that Ian had just put down his hand and was preparing to enter the second phase, resorting to lock-picking skills since no one was home. He had just taken out his tools when he heard a response from inside the door.
“Knock knock knock~”
The same knocking sound.
It sounded like someone was imitating Ian’s earlier knocking.
“Someone’s here, someone’s here.”
On the other side of the mysterious door, not only was someone imitating Ian’s knocking, but a voice also responded, a very, very childish voice.
It was even in American English.
However, the somewhat clumsy feel made one suspect that the language was learned recently.
“Huh?”
Ian was taken aback.
He didn’t understand why, apart from the little witch Madison and the Gotham Freak, there was anyone else in the Myriad Worlds whose speech was more contrived than his.
It was almost as contrived as a one-year-old baby!
“Is someone on the other side? I heard you, I saw you,” the childish voice spoke again, its tone soft and sweet like a little girl’s, and its manner filled with a pitiful aura.
Clearly, this was a master of the “contrived” art, at least at the level of an Archon Grandmaster.
“Damn it! This house is so extravagant! The garden outside is endless, what are you being pitiful about!” Ian couldn’t help but kick the mysterious door twice.
His complaints did not anger the other party.
“Please, can you open the door for me? I’ve been inside for a very, very long time, and I’m so bored. Just open it a little, just a crack, and let me crawl out.”
Persistent knocking resumed, accompanied by a pleading, childlike voice—the other party was clearly anxious, and the knocking sound could even be described as shaking.
“Rumble~~~”
The entire door shook.
The little girl’s voice was clearly powerful.
“Rumble, rumble~”
“I really want to go out. Just open a small gap and let me go out for a stroll, and I promise I’ll lock myself back in!”
“It’s just a gap. I can move myself, I can get out myself.” The little girl’s voice turned slightly tearful, but Ian was not softened by this.
He had tried pushing this door twice.
It didn’t budge at all.
Yet, the other party could make the door shake violently. Even setting aside the uncertainty of what was on the other side, a being with such strange power was unlikely to be benevolent.
A little girl?
Just going out for a stroll?
“Do you think I’d believe you? I get it, you’re a sealed evil, someone competing with Master Ian for the same position. Unfortunately, your lying skills are not even a fraction of mine.”
“If there’s an online shopping platform inside, I suggest you buy a copy of 《 Master Ian: The Art of the Truth 》.” Ian knew he used the same tone when he deceived others. He not only became vigilant but also took out thousands of locks and heavily reinforced the door from top to bottom.
“This door is probably tricky.”
Even Thor sensed something was wrong.
This suddenly made the “little girl” inside the door anxious.
“You haven’t eaten enough, so you can’t open it. Go eat more, and then come back and open it for me after you’re full. I can fulfill anything you want. What do you want? I can make anything appear for you.” She tried to lure Ian with benefits.
“Evil God Master, I can find or create whatever I want myself. Besides, I can’t push this door open either, so give up. Let’s pretend we never met.” Ian was unmoved by such temptation. His gaze at the mysterious door, a tool for leveling up, was filled with reluctance.
Just as Ian was making a decision.
“You are lying, but I am not lying to you… Let me think about how to persuade you… Oh, right, this is the Gate of Heaven, and I am an angel who can fulfill all wishes!”
The little girl’s voice suddenly became proud. Her childish voice also carried a sense of absolute sincerity, though her lying skills still needed improvement.
An angel?
Ian was not unfamiliar with the style of angels and the Door of Heaven.
“Hahaha, I’m occasionally the King of Angels too, how come I didn’t know you were an angel? Stop messing around, it’s not fun outside, you just stay in there and count your own hair!”
Ian didn’t want to discard this upgrade tool, but he not only couldn’t take the Door, he also felt a slight doubt about what was sealed within the Door.
Facing Ian’s distrust, the little girl became obviously anxious.
“Why don’t you believe me? Let me out, and I’ll show you my one, two, three, four, five… twenty-eight thousand pairs of beautiful wings and over eight thousand beautiful little feet.”
The little girl behind the Door’s voice suddenly took on a whiny tone.
“How many feet?”
Ian, who was about to leave, suddenly stopped.
He turned sharply and rushed back to the Door in three steps, his nose almost touching the door.
“Say that again?”
Ian’s voice was very loud.
Thor watched the suddenly emotional Ian in a daze.
“Calm down.”
He said softly, trying to persuade him.
Ian, however, turned a deaf ear.
“Eight thousand!” The little girl’s voice immediately became cheerful, “Each one is wearing a crystal shoe!”
She thought she had persuaded Ian.
However.
Ian’s expression gradually shifted from shock to indignation.
With a “swish,” he took out a sticky note from his pocket and wrote “House of Liars” in a flamboyant manner, then slapped it onto the door with a “snap.”
“I only have twelve feet, and you dare to have eight thousand! You’re lying! Liar!” Ian stomped his foot in anger. Even counting his mimic spider legs and external Speed Force legs, he could only piece together twelve feet. Regarding the boastful words from behind the door, even if they were true, he had to choose not to believe them.
There can only be one Evil God in this world!
A gritted voice came from behind the door. Ian walked away without looking back, bent down to pick up Gungnir stuck in the ground, the tip of which was still stained with Thor’s gluteal tissue.
“Let’s go.”
He flicked the blood drops off the spear and turned to look at Thor.
“Where can we go now?”
Thor limped along with Ian.
“Of course, to find others.” Ian inspected the runes on the spear. “You don’t think it’s just the two of us unlucky souls who fell into this godforsaken place, do you?”
“How do we find them?”
As soon as Thor asked, he regretted it.
A glimmer of wisdom flashed in Ian’s eyes.
“Do you know what an intelligence of 72.4 means?”
He stroked the spear shaft.
“You definitely don’t – watch this.”
Ian gripped Gungnir with full confidence.
Under Thor’s surprised gaze, Ian began to whisper to Gungnir.
“Listen, new friend, I know you haven’t had enough fun yet.” As Ian’s “Whisper” skill activated, Gungnir’s shaft began to warm up slightly.
“There’s a more perfect butt up ahead, a universally acknowledged perky butt, recognized even outside the universe. So, shoot at it. Our next destination is Captain America Steve Rogers’ butt!” As Ian gave the instruction, Gungnir began to vibrate at high frequency.
“Captain America’s perky butt is worthy of you, this divine spear, to…” Ian took a deep breath, “make a pilgrimage!”
With his “mental pollution” incitement, Gungnir actually trembled slightly in his hand, the tip of the spear glowing brighter and brighter, as if infused with some kind of bizarre “target lock” program. It began to rotate autonomously, its tip slowly lifting, pointing towards an invisible coordinate deep in the void.
“NOOOOO—!!”
Thor lunged to grab it, but it was too late.
“That’s it!”
Ian shouted and swung his arm fiercely!
Gungnir transformed into a golden meteor that tore through the void, two stowaways attached to its tail – Ian firmly secured himself and Thor to the spear with mimic tentacles.
They were dragged along at high speed as if riding the subway.
“I knew it was you trying to harm my butt!”
While speeding along, Thor tightly protected the sanitary napkin he was taking with him.
“How is this possible?! How can you use my Father God’s weapon?!” He was also shocked that Ian could use Gungnir, even more so than Ian being able to lift Mjolnir.
Could the Evil God before him be a divine artifact killer?
“Hmm?”
Ian shouted amidst the howling wind.
“My dear follower! You know nothing of the capabilities of the Lord Evil God!” His mimic tentacles began to weave comfortable seats below Gungnir.
Soon.
Ian and Thor disappeared from the Door. The little girl behind the Door seemed to be stomping her feet in anger, and the “House of Liars” label on the bronze Door suddenly burst into flames.
It turned into ashes and drifted away.
“So, does he or does he not like loli? What kind of life with how many feet does he actually prefer?”
“Why! Why won’t you let me tell him that I am the Multiverse itself? If he doesn’t release me, I can’t rebuild the Multiverse? That’s clearly his duty!”
“Alright… I have patience, I will wait.”
……
It was unclear who this voice was talking to, but her emotions gradually calmed down during this mysterious exchange, finally turning into a slowly fading sigh.
“Saint Dark Abyss Blood Pupil World Ending Dirge Player Inheritor of Crimson Moon Curse Eternal Night First Emperor Executer of Fallen Divine Punishment K Augustus Abyss Echo Twined with Eternal Night Thorns Rebel Soul God Slayer Candidate Number 4399 Fusion Line of Chaos and Order Embodiment of the Wailing of Falling Stars Ian Ultimate Idealist Superman…”
“Who would have thought that the demon who gave himself such a long name would leave for so long and return, still a demon – perhaps I shouldn’t have insulted him like this.”
“After all, in the end… he truly acted as a superhero.”
This self-muttering sigh fell silent within the Door, like an extinguished candle flame, its afterglow rippling in the void before being swallowed by eternal darkness.
The Door began to become ethereal – if it could truly be called a door.
After Ian left, the Door was no longer clear, just a blurry outline in the void, its edges constantly twisting and deforming, as if about to dissipate into the boundless darkness at any moment. Meanwhile, in the depths of the void, countless light-years away from the Door, Gungnir drew a dazzling golden trajectory.
The runes on the spear lit up one by one, forming a shield that could barely resist the erosion of the void. Where the spear tip pointed, space was cut open like butter.
Revealing an even deeper darkness behind it.
Soon, the darkness ahead began to twist, forming countless vortex-like rifts. A particularly large rift suddenly opened, like the universe opening its eyes.
“Hold on tight!” Ian finally shouted a sound that could be heard. Gungnir shot towards the rift like an arrow released from a bow, the runes on the spear erupting with dazzling light.
The moment they crossed the rift, Ian felt his body being torn into countless fragments, every atom separated and reassembled. He saw Thor’s body also disintegrating, his golden armor scattering into light spots. The most terrifying thing was the fragmentation of consciousness – he existed in countless moments in time simultaneously, both a newborn baby and a dying old man.
Then, everything suddenly stopped.
Gravity reasserted itself. Ian felt himself falling, the sound of rushing wind in his ears. Below was the outline of a city, but shrouded in an unnatural gloom.
“Damn it, I didn’t get any experience points!” Ian felt the discomfort of the experience, only to find he had gained nothing, and truly felt like he had lost out.
Aberrant Master Experience Points settlement complete.
Based on the life strength of existing dependents, you have gained Aberrant Master Experience Points +11.
Fortunately, at the moment of escaping the void, Ian did receive some comfort. This was the daily settlement for Aberrant Master, possibly delayed until after leaving the void due to some reasons.
“Better than nothing! Better than nothing!” Ian became happy again. After all, he was easily satisfied, and this wave of “not losing” was a great victory.
Due to the previous unpleasant experience, Ian’s mimic mode had a technical malfunction, so he and Thor were detached from Gungnir, tumbling in mid-air.
As the ground gradually approached, Ian used his Tyrant Flight ability to hover in mid-air, but some people reacted much slower than him.
Thor, along with his father and Loki, who should have been his younger brother, directly plunged towards the ground like an Indian falling off a train after suddenly losing their “hangers.”
“Oh! No!”
Thor felt the tentacles at his waist suddenly disappear, and the sensation of weightlessness washed over him like a tidal wave. He instinctively tightened his grip on Loki’s ankle and Odin’s collar, their three bodies twisting into a comical spiral in the air.
The moment this blond Asgardian descendant touched the sandy ground, the impact wave sent crows within a ten-meter radius flying, and the earth was smashed into a perfect “big” shaped crater.
They wouldn’t be injured, of course.
After all, they were divine bodies.
“Ptooey, ptooey, ptooey!”
Thor looked very disheveled.
When the dust settled, Thor’s legs were sticking out of the pit and twitching, Loki’s face was buried in Odin’s armpit, and Loki’s soul within Odin’s body instinctively let out a muffled groan.
“Are… are you… are you guys okay?”
Thor, looking very disheveled, pulled the two comatose bodies out of the pit, unsure whether to care about his father’s body or his father’s soul in Loki’s swapped body.
“I have plum candy here, feed it to them and they’ll be fine.”
Ian slowly descended from mid-air, his void tentacles retracting into his body like a receding tide. He gently touched down, his posture as elegant as if to contrast with Thor’s appearance.
“Thor, you still have a long way to go to become a qualified superhero.” Ian drew out his words, displaying the elegance of an Evil God towards Thor, who had just climbed out of the pit.
“Can you blame me? If you hadn’t suddenly retracted those disgusting tentacles, how could I have reacted in time?” Thor was so angry his beard was about to stand on end.
He was holding Loki’s ankle in his left hand and Odin’s body in his right arm – more accurately, Loki’s body containing Odin’s soul.
The King of Asgard was currently rolling his eyes, a leaf in his mouth.
“My dad, and my dad’s body, thankfully they weren’t broken.” Thor fumbled to place “Odin” on the ground, then felt it was wrong, and quickly straightened Loki up too.
As a result, the two bodies collided with a “thud.”
“Are you performing an advanced version of a ghost marriage, a zombie marriage?” Ian couldn’t watch anymore and took out two sleeping bags to put over Thor’s “two dads” respectively.
“Gods above, I can’t take care of comatose people at all!” Thor sighed, revealing his childlike nature, and then looked at Ian with a resentful gaze.
Ian touched Odin’s nose, and with an awkward yet polite danger, said, “It’s really not my fault this time. My mimic ability occasionally goes haywire like this.”
“It’s probably related to my lack of concentration.” Ian also sighed like Thor, mainly because he was still feeling uncomfortable from the motion sickness.
“Isn’t that because you were distracted!” Thor roared, his voice sending a flock of crows flying from a tree – wait, why were those crows’ eyes blood red?
“Look! Wild zombies!”
Ian reacted faster than Thor, pointing at a group of shambling humanoid creatures not far away, a hint of surprise and astonishment flashing in his eyes.
Ian was familiar with this type of creature, having seen them in videos from New Teacher Tony about dimensional rifts, so was he and Thor now in the pocket universe where Iron Man’s daughter was?
Just as Ian was analyzing.
Thor finally looked around alertly, only to see that the commotion he had caused by falling had attracted dense swarms of zombies. These monsters shuffled along with a strange persistence towards them.
Their skin was a decaying grayish-green, some even showing bare white bone, their eye sockets filled with cloudy eyeballs, their mouths hanging with dried blood and rotting flesh. Even more disgusting, some zombies’ abdomens were ruptured, their intestines dragging on the ground like wriggling maggots.
These intestines and entrails made a sticky sound as they scraped against the ground with their movements.
“Damn it! What the hell are these things!” Thor exclaimed in shock, gripping Mjolnir, lightning crackling on the hammer. He had much more courage than at the beginning.
At least he knew to prepare for battle when facing an enemy.
Instead of evading.
“Oh, these are the small pastries that Master Ian doesn’t like to eat.” Ian said with disdain, as if critiquing a bad dish. Zombie viruses indeed didn’t sound very appetizing.
Master Ian could have many identities.
But he didn’t want one of his identities to be Zombie Ian. If he became Zombie Ian, it would not only be a betrayal of the city but also a betrayal of his stunning good looks.
“You don’t eat them… then they’re indeed very dirty.” Thor snorted coldly, swung Mjolnir, and smashed it hard onto the ground. Brilliant lightning instantly exploded on the surface, and countless arcs spread outwards like silver snakes. The zombie infants twitched all over, their scorched skin emitting wisps of smoke.
The air was immediately filled with the stench of roasted rotten flesh.
“It seems these monsters aren’t strong.” Thor shook his hammer, his long golden hair flowing in the lightning, a hint of pride on his face as he felt proud of his strength.
Ian, however, touched his chin, thinking he shouldn’t let Thor become too arrogant. People who are too arrogant tend to cause trouble, and he was working hard and putting in a lot of effort for his followers.
“Ordinary zombies are indeed not strong, but ordinary zombies are just the lowest level. Above them are one-star zombies, two-star zombies, up to nine-star zombies.”
“Further up, there are Corpse Beings, Corpse Spirits, Corpse Kings, Corpse Emperors, Corpse Lords, Corpse Venerables, and, a zombie that only one in the entire world is allowed to exist – the Corpse Emperor!”
“This is an incredibly powerful existence.”
“The Corpse Emperor stands at the end of time and space, surrounded by the laws of decay and eternity. His mere existence can cause the river of time in billions of universes to ripple with corpse spots.”
“At a glance, cause and effect are reversed, and beings from the past and future will contract the zombie virus under his gaze. He is the personification of the end, the singularity of corpse transformation in the infinite universe.”
Ian’s talent as a writer remained as astonishing as ever. With just a casual remark, he used the “Pinduoduo” method to sketch out a magnificent world.
His claims were quite fantastical.
And quite serious.
The landlord’s eldest son immediately believed him.
“W-what?” Thor’s eyes widened, and he even stammered. He instinctively looked around, as if something terrifying would crawl out of the ground at any moment.
No wonder Thor was like that.
This was Thor’s first time traversing the universe.
“Still not brave enough. A mere Zombie Emperor can be suppressed by Lord Evil God with one hand. You should have seen your expression just now, it was as if you heard Hela was coming to your birthday party!”
Ian delivered a sharp critique.
Then.
He looked into the distance.
On the horizon, a giant figure wrapped in purple energy was slowly approaching. With every step it took, the ground trembled.
The surrounding buildings collapsed like building blocks.
“Damn it.” Thor swallowed, “That wouldn’t be… what you said…”
“No, that’s just an ordinary zombie with a giant complex.” Ian said calmly, “But according to my insight level, it’s probably about three and a half stars?”
He still maintained his belief that if he lied enough, no one would suspect it was fake.
Saying this.
Ian’s eyes suddenly lit up with brilliant golden light, and two scorching beams swept out. Wherever they passed, the zombies let out shrill screams, their bodies compressed and twisted by some bizarre force, eventually all turning into… zombie infants. Even the giant zombie turned into a tiny infant.
They lay on the ground, their skin wrinkled and grayish-blue, emitting weak “wah wah” sounds from their mouths, their rotting little hands weakly scratching at the air, looking both disgusting and bizarre.
“What… what kind of evil technique is this?!”
Thor was dumbfounded, his jaw almost hitting the ground.
“Reverse Evolution Ray, it’s more environmentally friendly than Eternal Day Eye.” Ian blinked, the golden light faded, and he rubbed his temples as if alleviating some mental burden.
Reverse Evolution Ray: Aberrant Master can release a beam of “Reverse Evolution Ray” from their eyes. After shining it on a target, it forces its gene sequence to degenerate towards its “primitive form” or “younger form,” causing its strength, intelligence, senses, and even appearance to degenerate. The degree of degeneration depends on the target’s mutation degree and the ray’s duration.
This ability has significant effects on mutants, superhumans, demons, angels, and artificial life forms, etc. For ordinary humans, it may cause them to devolve into more primitive life forms such as beasts and reptiles—evolution is the glory you bestow, and devolution is the punishment you inflict. 】
This new ability was applied for the first time.
The effect was good.
However, the mental burden was indeed quite heavy. Of course, Ian felt it was necessary for him to use this skill, as directly burning the zombies to ashes would be too polluting.
It’s more environmentally friendly to devolve them into infants.
Eco-friendly Ian.
Exactly!
“Don’t you think they look much cuter now?”
He looked down, kicked a zombie infant at his feet, and asked Thor.
Thor’s expression was as if he had swallowed a whole Frost Giant.
“…You call this cute?!”
He still couldn’t quite understand the aesthetic of an evil god.
“At least they don’t have teeth and can’t bite anymore,” Ian spread his hands, his tone relaxed, “And look, they can’t even crawl, they just lie on the ground and howl, so much less trouble.”
“I’ll raise my children this way in the future.”
Ian’s divergent thinking was always excellent. His views on parenting caused Thor to fall silent for a few seconds. He stared at the zombies that had turned into infants and finally couldn’t help but ask.
“Where exactly did you learn this… this method?” Thor had already looked up lore about evil gods, and the evil gods in Asgardian mythology were completely different from Ian.
“Do I need to learn something like this specifically?” Ian tapped his head and said with a smile, “It’s all fruit from the amazing tree of wisdom in my own head.”
His words were full of praise for his own brain, believing that the Super Brain would surely feel the emotional connection.
“…”
Thor was speechless again. He could only lower his head to observe the zombie infants. They had indeed lost their aggressiveness, but their skin was still grayish-dead, their eyes were cloudy and lifeless, clearly not truly alive. Thor frowned, a sense of unease rising in his heart.
“Ian…”
He spoke in a low voice, his tone rarely carrying a hint of solemnity.
“What place have we come to?”
Thor had a very bad premonition about this strange world.
Only then did Ian retract his smile and look around—a blood-red sky, a decaying land, and the distant, indistinct roars of zombies and the cries of unknown creatures.
He took a deep breath and slowly uttered two words.
“Zombie Universe.”
Ian was only serious for a second.
“I bet there’s definitely a zombie version of you here—and you definitely can’t beat Zombie Thor!” Ian said confidently, making Thor, the Thunder God, want to retort indignantly.
At that moment.
A shrill scream suddenly came from the distance.
“Ahhh—my butt!!”
Ian and Thor turned their heads simultaneously. The voice was melodious, with the dramatic flair unique to American heroes, sounding like a high-pitched solo from a Broadway musical.
“As expected of Captain America, who was a model, a singer, and did everything! It seems the Gungnir didn’t hit Zombie Captain America, or Zombie Captain America wouldn’t be screaming so nicely.”
Ian quickly took out a band-aid and ran towards the direction of the sound. He saw that Captain America’s butt had been shot by Gungnir, and he was lying on the ground in great pain.
Gungnir was precisely lodged in the center of his perky buttocks.
Gwen was frantically trying to pull the spear out for him.
With every pull, Captain America let out a higher-pitched scream.
“Gently! Gently! This is a human butt, not a vibranium butt!”
Captain America pounded the ground in pain.
However, listening to his full-voiced cries, the injury was indeed not serious. Under Ian’s instigation, Gungnir’s temper was not as bad as before, and it knew its limits when withdrawing.
“I’m trying! But this spear is stuck too deep!”
Gwen bit her lip and gave a sudden tug.
“Aaaagh!!”
Captain America’s scream startled more blood-eyed crows into flight.
“Gwen, I knew you were the English-speaking type, the closest follower to me!” Ian dashed over and, under Gwen’s startled gaze, knelt on one knee. He first took out a spray bottle from his pocket, labeled “Super Butt Repair Cream （Strawberry Flavor ）”, and sprayed it twice on Captain America’s wound with a “zzzz”.
Then, with the technique of a professional screen protector installer, he applied a large band-aid with a “snap”.
Captain America looked up, tears welling in his blue eyes, and opened his mouth to scold. Ian quickly stuffed a wad of US dollars into his mouth: “Injury compensation, Captain.”
This was a welfare benefit everyone in the new Justice League had.
Ian liked to treat people according to their nature.
“What? So much, so much US Dollar?” Captain America’s expression changed instantly. He grabbed the money and counted it, his smile as bright as a child seeing an ice cream truck.
“I am a loyal soldier! A mere mortal wound, nothing more!” He tried to flip over stylishly, but when he touched the wound, he gasped again and collapsed back onto the ground.
Just as Captain America was about to say that as long as it wasn’t near his crotch, he could handle anything, a deafening engine roar suddenly came from the sky in the distance. A ferocious-looking flying chariot tore through the clouds, its tail spewing azure flames, drawing a dangerous arc at low altitude before landing heavily in front of them.
The chariot’s hatch hissed open, and a petite figure agilely jumped out. She wore a form-fitting black battle suit, a strangely shaped pulse pistol holstered at her waist, and her neat short hair whipped in the wind. When she raised her head and her gaze swept over everyone, it suddenly locked onto Ian.
“Uncle Ian?”
The girl was taken aback.
She spoke, and it was a familial entanglement.
Her opening words were a plea for recognition.
