Chapter 116: 《the Life I Want To Die For》
Just say it if you want Teacher Huang to sleep in the doghouse!
Sister Shang listened with eyes glancing toward the kitchen, a bit tempted yet a bit resistant.
“No way, you even want to eat your own melon?”
Chi Ye was very shocked.
Sister Shang: “…”
She tucked a strand of hair behind her ear, blinked at Chi Ye, and walked into the room: “Not talking about it now, I’m going to check in at the virtual space.”
Chi Ye: “?”
What was this about? What was she saying?
After recording Time With You with Mom Wen 《Time With You》, did she get infected?
He couldn’t figure out what Sister Shang meant, but he didn’t pay too much attention either. He glanced at the kitchen, now a chaotic mess, and felt very satisfied.
—I told you to administer drugs to me, go ahead with these four crouching dragons causing trouble.
Whether Teacher Huang successfully administered the drugs or not was unknown, but right up until lunch was served, he stayed in a busy state, full of energy.
“Here it comes, the final chicken soup is here, time to eat~”
Teacher Huang personally brought the chicken feet stew to the table, turned back and shouted: “Kids, let’s eat.”
Chi Ye walked in from outside and casually said: “Teacher Yang Zi isn’t here either, who are you shouting to?”
Teacher Huang: “?”
Don’t mention that big idiot to me!
Bad luck!
The other kids said nothing, each with uneasy expressions.
Of course, the four crown princes were still vying to say: “I helped Teacher Huang make it.”
“I added the seasoning.”
“I watched the heat.”
“I prepared the chicken feet.”
Chi Ye nodded and pointed them out one by one: “You helped commit the crime, you administered the drugs, you posted as a lookout, you destroyed the corpse.”
Finally, he looked at Jiang Cheng, who spoke first: “Four accomplices?”
Fourth Prince: “?!”
“Haha, Xiao Chi just likes to joke.”
Mom Wen walked out boldly, rubbing her belly: “Sigh, dieting lately, lost forty pounds last month, can’t eat too much today.”
Chi Ye glanced at Mom Wen, a bit shocked.
Because Wen Lijuan’s body weight should already be under a hundred pounds, losing forty pounds…
“Mom Wen, you trying to cosplay Jiang Cheng? Want to be a makeup mantis too?”
Mom Wen: “?”
Jiang Cheng: “…Chi Ye, eat more, I made this dish specially for you.”
Chi Ye kept a straight face, withdrew his gaze, sat on the chair as if he hadn’t heard.
Bullet comments flooded the screen.
「hhh, won’t Hu Ye really get beaten to death like this?」
「Got a backer now, not afraid of anything, can say whatever, huh.」
「Laughing to death, fast-forward to making Chi Ye eat the meal Teacher Huang made himself, fast-forward!」
「Why hasn’t Sister Shang come out yet?」
「Sister, can’t see my sister’s stunning beauty, food doesn’t taste good!」
Everyone in the room had also noticed that one person was missing from the dinner table.
“Where’s Xiao Shang?”
“Seems still in the room.”
“Call her out to eat.”
How could the four crown princes miss this opportunity?
They “rushed” to shout one after another; someone lagged a step and took another approach, directly pulling out a chair for Shang Youshu, then realizing Shang Youshu hadn’t come out yet—who knew where she would sit?
Without knowing her position, how could they sit?
So, after the four shouted, they didn’t sit immediately, standing by the table like four guardians, posing awkwardly.
“The food today is pretty good.”
“Jiang Cheng, sit down.”
Peach Crown Prince directly pulled a nasty trick on Jiang Cheng, an open scheme, pulling a chair for him.
Jiang Cheng glanced at him and shook his head: “Not convenient.”
“Hm?”
Peach Crown Prince was stunned: “Not convenient? Where?”
Chi Ye heard this and explained for his good brother: “Got hemorrhoids, and you’re still asking.”
Peach Crown Prince suddenly understood.
Jiang Cheng: “…Yeah, not feeling well, I’ll stand for a bit.”
Quite satisfied with Chi Ye’s “assist” this time.
Then his eyes turned, same nasty trick, turning the scheme against him, pointed to a spot and said to Peach Crown Prince: “You sit first.”
Peach Crown Prince fell silent: “…What a coincidence, I’ve been getting internal heat lately, got two too!”
He looked back at the other two crown princes.
The two crown princes: “…”
They smiled slightly, said nothing, everything was unspoken.
Chi Ye was speechless: “All hemorrhoid youths, huh.”
He couldn’t stand watching this scene, turned and shouted: “Teacher Xiao Shang, come out soon or this place will turn into a proctology hospital, come eat!”
“Is Xiao Shang not feeling well? I’ll go check.”
Mom Wen was a bit worried.
…
Meanwhile.
In the large room shared by Shang Youshu, Mom Wen, and Lin Jingyi.
She was lying sideways on the bed, little face a bit pale, but still smiling carefree, one hand warming her little belly, the other not forgetting to check in and earn points for the #Chi Pan Xia Yu# CP super topic.
Hearing the shouts outside, she propped herself up with her arms, hurriedly tried to get down, but her little belly felt uncomfortable again; after a moment, she got off the bed, put on shoes, and called out smilingly: “Coming, coming.”
“You okay, Xiao Shang? Not feeling well?”
Mom Wen walked in and asked.
“I’m fine… um…” Shang Youshu glanced at the camera, turned sideways to avoid the lens, and whispered to Mom Wen: “I got my period…”
“Oh… then… rest a bit more? I’ll boil some brown sugar water for you?”
Mom Wen liked to brag, but she was indeed a great guardian.
“No need.”
Sister Shang smiled smugly: “My periods don’t hurt much, just a little uncomfortable, let’s go eat.”
“…Then no sneaking drinks today, not good.”
Mom Wen nagged: “Don’t take it lightly, you’re young now, but when you reach Mom Wen’s age you’ll know… actually it’s fine…”
Sister Shang: “Meh?”
“Cough cough… of course, Mom Wen herself is fine, but Mom Wen has a friend who… anyway, take care of your body!”
“Got it, don’t worry, I know.”
Shang Youshu pushed Wen Lijuan to the living room, waved to everyone: “Sorry, you all waited for me? Let’s eat, let’s eat!”
With that, her bright eyes casually scanned and she sat down next to Chi Ye.
To be next to Shang Youshu, the four crown princes who conjured hemorrhoids out of thin air: “?!”
Damn, there’s one spot left!
They locked onto the seat to Shang Youshu’s left—right was Chi Ye, left was…
Wen Lijuan, who already had a spot, plopped her butt down next to Shang Youshu: “I’ll sit here, hehe… close to the doorway, I like a little cold breeze when idle, good exercise.”
Everyone: “…”
Mom Wen said so, what could they say?
They could only glare jealously at the expressionless Chi Ye.
Damn, you think you can compete with us?
Chi Ye noticed their gazes, turned back, raised a brow: “What? Staring won’t make me swap with you!”
Everyone: “…”
“Teacher Xiao Chi…”
After Shang Youshu and the four sat, seeing no one paying attention, she lowered her voice to Chi Ye: “These four backgrounds are pretty strong, why always conflict with them?”
Chi Ye glanced sideways at her: “You feeling unwell?”
“Hm?”
Sister Shang was stunned, immediately shook her head: “No, I’m great.”
Chi Ye nodded, said no more.
He just asked casually seeing Shang Youshu hadn’t come out for so long.
Good that she’s fine.
“Alright then, everyone’s here, let’s eat.”
Teacher He called out, but Teacher Huang reached out: “Hey, wait.”
Everyone was stunned.
Teacher Huang looked at Chi Ye, pouted: “Fans eat first.”
Everyone: “…”
Chi Ye: “?”
He scanned the table full of poisoned food, relied on memory to pick up a chopstick of vinegar-stir-fried shredded potatoes made by Mom Wen’s son Ba Sa, tasted it, and nodded repeatedly: “Delicious, delicious.”
Teacher Huang: “?”
Just as he was about to speak, Teacher He pulled him back, smiling: “Come on, let’s officially start eating.”
“Together, it’s 《the life we want》!”
“Dig in!”
All the guests started eating; Teacher Huang still unwilling, opened the steaming chicken feet stew, chased after: “Come on Chi Ye, try this, I made it specially for you, very nourishing.”
Chi Ye glanced at the chicken feet stew, various mushy ingredients inside vaguely mixed with Teacher Huang’s saliva and dish soap taste; he looked at Shang Youshu, lowered his voice and muttered: “I’ll tell you Rise’s big melon.”
The originally listless Sister Shang perked up, a blush appeared on her fairy-like little face, bright eyes looked at the four crown princes, then withdrew, thought for a bit, said: “These chicken feet seem to be the ones I bought yesterday…”
“Hm?!”
The four guardians heard, instantly jolted, exchanging glances.
Mang Crown Prince reacted fastest, chopsticks grabbed a chicken foot, stuffed it in: “Mm… these chicken feet are fresh!”
“…I love chicken feet too, yesterday I went out to buy with Youshu.”
Peach Crown Prince unhurried, followed with chopsticks.
Then Cool Crown Prince.
Jiang Cheng watched these three big idiots dumbfounded, felt dizzy, roared inwardly: Damn it, I’m the male lead! I am!!
“I like drinking the soup, make way, I’ll ladle some soup to mix with rice!”
He stood up directly, unafraid of the hot chicken feet stew, poured all the soupy water into his bowl.
Thought to himself, back home team will announce: #《Meng Xi Yuan》 super shippable! Jiang Cheng so doting!#
Chi Ye watched the chicken feet stew instantly “eliminated” before him, marveled at Sister Shang’s method—one move harms four sages!!
Ran Qiao on the other side watched this scene, felt a bit nauseous…
She and Chi Ye had just seen how Teacher Huang cooked; seeing the four crown princes all act like it was “world-class delicious,” this…
These four all had weird tastes?!
“Hey… these chicken feet don’t seem flavorful, Old Huang.”
At this time, Mom Wen, who was ruthless on herself for dieting, had already picked a chicken foot first; after a few bites, she frowned and criticized: “Not flavorful.”
Teacher Huang: “?!”
Teacher He quickly said beside: “Baby, dip it in the soup to eat.”
Mom Wen: “…”
Glanced at the chicken feet soup already “swept clean” by Jiang Cheng.
“Mm…”
Jiang Cheng, having finished one chicken foot, felt guilty seeing this, immediately changed topic, nodded in amazement: “Wow… this chicken feet… this stew is really good.”
Mang Crown Prince beside joined in: “Huang kitchen god!”
Teacher Huang: “…”
Why does this title feel off?
Chi Ye picked another chopstick of vinegar-stir-fried shredded potatoes beside, retorted: “This title isn’t great, and Teacher Huang is still a bit far from ‘god.'”
Everyone puzzled, Teacher Huang especially delighted.
From this, Chi Ye actually wanted to praise him?
“Indeed a bit lacking.” Teacher Huang waved casually as if indifferent, looked at Chi Ye, expectant for his answer.
Chi Ye puzzledly glanced at Teacher Huang: “No worry, Teacher Huang is a bit far from god, but even farther from human.”
“Cough cough…”
Shang Youshu had just secretly sipped hot water, nearly choked.
Everyone: “…”
Teacher Huang laughed relieved instantly.
Yes, this is Chi Ye, the damn Chi Ye!!
Die!!
「Hahaha, Hu Ye killed me, broke Teacher Huang’s defense.」
「6, this episode is great.」
「Strongly suggest Hu Ye permanent resident at 《Mushroom House》, Teacher Huang lives ten years less!」
「…」
Teacher He tapped Chi Ye, couldn’t hold it: “Eat.”
“Got it.”
Chi Ye lowered his head to eat, skillfully skipping crab roe and chicken feet stew and other heavy-tasting foods.
Bullet comments started brushing 「post poison detection sensitivity, online waiting, quite urgent.」
At the table, after this commotion, the atmosphere grew ever more “lively”; Peach Crown Prince endured nausea, finished the chicken feet stew, didn’t forget to say to Shang Youshu: “Chicken feet we bought together, just delicious.”
Sister Shang turned her head, whispered to Chi Ye: “Can he endorse Zhang Xianming’s chicken feet?”
Chi Ye: “…”
Peach Crown Prince here unaware Sister Shang was mocking him; after finishing chicken feet, he urgently needed to suppress the churning in his stomach.
Eyes targeted the stir-fried liver Teacher Huang specially made today.
He was Beijing local, this was the dish he requested before coming.
Peach Crown Prince eagerly put stir-fried liver in his mouth, chewed carefully for two seconds, instantly felt his mouth filled with an unmistakable taste… not stinky, but like half-year dead salted fish, salty enough to twist the senses.
“Hm? What’s wrong?”
Teacher Huang noticed his expression, asked caringly.
Peach Crown Prince: “Teacher Huang, this stir-fried liver is way too salty!”
Teacher Huang: “Ah?”
Teacher He, unsurprised, stood up: “If salty, drink some water.”
Peach Crown Prince: “…”
“No need for water.”
Chi Ye had almost finished eating, immediately suggested: “Mom Wen said her chicken feet weren’t flavorful? Let Mom Wen dip in your stir-fried liver, you eat Mom Wen’s chicken feet, perfect match.”
Everyone: “?!”
Peach Crown Prince: “???”
Genius!
Discharge!
Everyone got complex expressions from Chi Ye’s description; Mom Wen silently put down the chicken foot, felt the gazes, kept straight face: “Sigh, in my youth I ate chicken feet daily, got sick of them.”
“Mom Wen ate phoenix in her youth.”
“…I’m full too.”
Sister Shang felt her belly uncomfortable again, sipped hot water, stood up: “You keep eating, call me when cleaning up later.”
“No need, it’s fine…”
Wen Lijuan’s words unfinished, Jiang Cheng said: “Youshu, no need for you to clean, I’ll do it.”
“I’m best at washing dishes, at home I often wash dishes for fun.”
Chi Ye handed over his just-finished bowl: “Thanks.”
Jiang Cheng: “?!”
Damn your mom, give me your bowl and I’ll smear poison in it!
The others followed suit, after eating handed their bowls to Jiang Cheng.
“Won’t it be too many?” Mom Wen concerned: “In my youth, could only wash forty or fifty.”
Jiang Cheng: “…Not many, I’ve washed a hundred.”
Mom Wen: “?”
Smiled at him, patted shoulder, stood up: “I’ll go check on Xiao Shang, you chat.”
But after everyone finished eating, sleepiness hit, plus afternoon labor, most importantly… Shang Youshu went inside, the four crown princes couldn’t compete anymore!
So, the four crown princes listlessly did chores, occasionally glancing at Shang Youshu’s room door.
Chi Ye sighed: “Is this the joy of the proud phoenix? Acted Sister Shang to satisfaction!”
