Chapter 79: The River God’s Identity
Although the River God statue was covered in scars and its face was terrifying, I could faintly discern a familiar trace from the clay figure’s eyebrows and eyes.
The River God’s face was chiseled and stern. Though his eyes were injured, his gaze was gentle and resolute. The scars all over the River God’s body… the fire at Peach Blossom Nunnery…
I distinctly remember that when Feng Gao ordered him to be carried out of the nunnery, the burns on his body were particularly severe from his thighs to both shoulders.
The River God statue before me was the same.
I found myself in a temple filled with wisps of incense smoke, and the memories I had deliberately sealed away seemed to emerge from some hidden box.
The people in front finished their kowtows and left, while those behind pushed their way in. I was jostled by the crowd, moving forward, closer and closer to the River God statue.
I forgot to offer incense and worship, merely staring into the River God’s eyes.
Cheng Huaishi.
How similar these eyes were to Cheng Huaishi’s.
Back then, in the room, when he told me “Judge me by my actions, only the Spring and Autumn Annals will know”; when he wrote on paper “My heart is as pure as the bright moon, yet even the bright moon has its phases”; when he was first promoted to the Ministry of Revenue, determined to achieve great things with Minister Zhang, to establish heart for heaven and earth, and establish destiny for the people, didn’t his eyes shine with such a light?
Perhaps, people with great righteousness in this world are all like this.
I sighed.
Slowly, I came back to my senses.
Green moss covers the ground after the early clearing, only the south wind remains a familiar acquaintance.
After Cheng Huaishi disappeared from Feng Gao’s private residence, there was no news of him. He should be living peacefully in some secluded corner with beautiful mountains and clear waters. I shouldn’t be overthinking.
I took out incense, bowed piously a few times, thanked the River God for his selfless protection, and then got up to leave.
Walking out of the temple, I saw an elderly person in black cloth clothes under a large tree, walking and crying, carrying a basket. Suddenly, he stumbled and fell to the ground.
I quickly had my servant boy help the elderly person up and brought him to the Zhu Family Wine Shop, asking a doctor to come and examine him.
The doctor arrived, took his pulse, and prescribed a remedy.
I ordered my servant boy to fetch the medicine according to the prescription, brew it, let it cool, and feed it to the elderly person.
Not long after, the elderly person woke up.
He eagerly bowed to thank me: “Thank you, young lady. You are compassionate to the old and poor, with a kind heart.”
I quickly said: “Elderly person, please don’t rush to get up. Rest well before you leave. I’ve asked the coachman to hitch the carriage, and I’ll send you home shortly.”
He said fearfully: “How can this be, how can this be… how can I trouble you…”
I said: “It’s no trouble. It’s just a small effort.”
He muttered to himself: “There are so many kind people. Mister is also such a kind person, but I harmed him. The gunpowder was given by me. He even paid silver…”
As he spoke, he began to sob.
“Mister was skilled in both civil and military arts, appearing out of nowhere and disappearing just as suddenly. Mister is a Bodhisattva, here to save mortals… Mister was already injured, and now there isn’t even a complete corpse… Mister didn’t like fish meat, he only liked bitter gourd. I made a basket of scallion oil bitter gourd to give to Mister, but Mister can no longer eat it…”
He clutched the small basket in his arms, his face filled with grief.
Hearing his words, my body stiffened.
Appearing out of nowhere.
Already injured.
Bitter gourd.
I said to the elderly person: “Elderly person, is the Mister you’re speaking of the River God from the River God temple?”
He looked around nervously. I signaled for the shop assistants to withdraw, and then he said: “Young lady, others must not know. Our Mister blew up the floodgate, flooding the Zheng Family’s private fields and ancestral temple. The Zheng Family harbors great resentment and might seek revenge. I was in the temple at the time and dared not say a word… Seeing that you are a kind person, this old one dares to speak the truth…”
He looked at me and said: “Mister taught the children in our village to read, without charging a single coin for tuition. He is a truly good person.”
“What kind of injury was on Mister’s body?”
He pondered: “It looked like burns. Mister said it was from playing with firecrackers when he was young, caused by the fuse.”
“When did he arrive in your village?”
“At the end of last winter.”
Calculating, it was exactly one month after the fire at Peach Blossom Nunnery.
“You said Mister liked to eat bitter gourd?”
“Yes. Mister said bitter gourd purifies the heart. In our village, families took turns cooking for Mister. The last time I made scallion oil bitter gourd, Mister liked it very much… Mister never wanted to trouble us; he always preferred the simplest meals…” The elderly person cried again.
Having been husband and wife with Cheng Huaishi, I remembered very clearly that he disliked overly sweet things and loved bitter gourd.
Layer upon layer, they overlapped.
How could there be such a coincidence?
After deep thought, I walked to the table and, based on the image of Cheng Huaishi being carried out of Peach Blossom Nunnery in my mind, I drew a portrait.
Holding the portrait, I handed it to the elderly person: “Elderly person, please take a look. Is this person the Mister from your village?”
The elderly person’s hands began to tremble. He exclaimed in surprise: “This is our Mister! Young lady, you know him?”
I neither nodded nor shook my head.
On this sweltering June day, I only felt the blood in my body growing colder inch by inch.
“Owner, the bill for Zhao Ji Restaurant in the west of the city has been settled. It’s eight hundred and seventy-six taels and three qian of silver. Please check it…”
Hua Lian returned from outside and was stunned to see the elderly person lying on the large chair inside. She couldn’t finish the rest of her sentence.
The elderly person called out: “Uncle San Tuo, why are you here?”
Hua Lian stammered: “Uncle San Tuo, why are you here?”
The elderly person recounted how I had saved him in front of the temple.
Hua Lian stepped forward and said: “Uncle San Tuo, this is the owner I work for.”
A short while later, the coachman hitched the carriage and helped the elderly man, San Tuo, onto it.
Uncle San Tuo repeatedly expressed his thanks.
After he left, I sat under the persimmon tree in the backyard, not saying a word.
The wind ruffled my hair.
Looking up, the bloody sunset on the horizon seemed reluctant to take away its remaining rays.
In the vast and boundless sky, shadows of floating clouds drifted by.
Hua Lian hesitated as she walked towards me.
“Owner… Owner…”
I didn’t look up at her.
“You said yesterday that your village was holding a funeral, that it was for him, right?”
Hua Lian gritted her teeth: “Yes.”
“When did you find out?”
“On the first day of the fifth month. I followed the owner’s sedan chair out and saw Mister. He was wearing black and his face was covered, coming to snatch the bride. I recognized him and followed for more than ten li. Owner, I really wanted to tell you. But Mister begged me not to tell you, he wanted you to be with Master Qin. He told me many reasons, I didn’t understand them all, but I remember one sentence was, was…” She tried hard to recall: “It was… what boat crossing, what reaching the shore, what returning…”
“Crossing the river together in the same boat, and returning separately upon reaching the shore.”
“Yes, yes! That’s it!”
A profound desolation instantly filled my heart.
“Hua Lian, you hid this from me.”
She knelt down with a thud, her forehead covered in sweat from anxiety.
“Owner, I truly didn’t want to hide it from you. For many days, I didn’t know what to do. Do you remember me staring blankly at the hairpin on your head? I told you then that there were some things I couldn’t understand, but I believed I would eventually figure them out. I originally planned to tell you first when I understood what was happening. But Mister, I had to listen to Mister’s words.”
Hairpin.
The bamboo hairpin on my head.
A beautiful time, joy in the present.
It turned out to be a wedding gift he had prepared for me.
After a while, I said: “Hua Lian, get up and go about your business.”
“Owner…” She looked at me, wanting to say more, but didn’t know how.
“Go,” I said again.
She got up and left, looking back three times.
“Owner, please don’t be sad. Mister said he least wants to see you sad.”
I buried my head in my knees.
The willows by the ferry are green, each branch and leaf filled with parting sorrow.
Henceforth, send no more letters, and the clouds and rain in the painted pavilion are without proof.
He had already made plans for a life where we would never see each other again.
What I thought was his seclusion and peace was merely my own assumption.
No matter how he concealed his identity, he is Cheng Huaishi, and will always be Cheng Huaishi. Before it was the New Policies, now it’s blowing up the floodgate. If this incident hadn’t happened, another would have. As long as he had half a breath left, he wouldn’t seek seclusion and peace.
He gave me completeness.
He gave Yangzhou City peace.
He transformed from a handsome young master into a clay statue in a temple.
He and I are separated by more than just life and death.
After the New Policies failed and he was imprisoned, he had already drawn an uncrossable Milky Way between us when he wrote the divorce letter.
I don’t know how long I sat there.
It was completely dark.
Someone walked over and sat beside me.
“Sang Yu—”
It was Qin Mingxu.
He said softly: “I’m waiting for you to come home for dinner.”
He draped a light garment over me: “If you want to sit a while longer, it’s alright, I’ll stay with you.”
I stood up and realized my legs had gone numb.
I stumbled into the small house in the backyard. Qin Mingxu followed behind me.
I hugged a jar of the strongest “Green Tomb” wine and tilted my head back to drink.
The heaviness in my heart made it hard to breathe. I just wanted to get drunk.
Qin Mingxu didn’t stop me.
He also picked up a jar of wine and said: “Sang Yu, I’ll drink with you.”
The night was hazy and vast. The sound of cicadas outside was sparse.
I don’t know how much I drank. The smell of alcohol filled the small house, and my vision blurred.
It felt as if Cheng Huaishi had returned.
He sat beside me, still dressed in snow-white clothes.
He hadn’t been burned by the fire. Nor was he injured.
His face was the same as before.
Drunk and disoriented, I moved closer and closer to him…
