Chapter 46: Gouzi
Upon arriving in Yangcheng, Gouzi first helped me find an inn and put away my belongings. Honestly, I didn’t bring much, just a few magic tools and two changes of clothes.
After putting our things down, Gouzi and I found a nearby restaurant.
The restaurant wasn’t large, but it looked very clean.
It was only ten in the morning, so it wasn’t too crowded.
Having known each other for years, the first thing Big Brother and I do every time we meet is have a good drink. We’ll discuss other matters while drinking, or after we’re done.
We casually ordered four dishes, not for any particular reason, but because when ordering, you either get two dishes or four.
In our Northeast China dialect, three dishes are usually for offerings or placed before a coffin when someone has passed away. In common terms, three dishes for the living are considered unlucky.
For a while, people online often made jokes about this, and when cursing someone, they’d say, “With your kind of behavior, you’ll never get to eat four dishes in this life,” which is a pure insult.
Also, when guests visit our home, we absolutely must serve four to six dishes, an even number representing good fortune.
If we visit someone else’s home and they serve three dishes, then we definitely can’t go next time; it’s meant as an insult.
Perhaps at times others don’t think of it that way, but it also signifies that they don’t consider you important.
Gouzi and I ordered a smashed cucumber salad, a must-have when drinking, and then garlic-flavored chicken feet.
We also had two hot dishes: Enoki mushrooms with beef and braised eggplant.
Before the dishes were ready, we asked the shopkeeper to bring us a dozen cold beers, which is six. Of course, we weren’t just drinking this little, but we were afraid if we took more, they wouldn’t stay cold.
The shopkeeper sent over a plate of peanuts and sunflower seeds for us to snack on.
My brother and I clinked glasses, and while shelling peanuts, we chatted about our experiences during this time.
Once all the dishes arrived, we each downed four or five large green bottles of beer.
I started the conversation, bringing up the current matter.
“Old Dog, what’s the situation with Teacher Wu?”
“Damn, I don’t know either. His house is quite far from mine. My family lives at the west end of the village, and his is at the east end. For years, I was in Beijing, you know this.
Afterwards, I went south with you. After returning early this year due to family matters, I haven’t been in much contact with the villagers. When Teacher Wu started acting up, I didn’t even know. I only heard about it from my mom.
The villagers had already called the police, and even when the police and people from the mental hospital arrived, it didn’t help at all.
But the villagers wouldn’t stand for it; they kept going to the village committee to complain. They demanded that the matter with Teacher Wu be resolved. Otherwise, the common folk wouldn’t have peace, and I heard that several sows had already been harmed.
The committee realized they couldn’t ignore the issue; if it escalated and reached higher authorities, it wouldn’t be good for anyone.
So, they thought about offering some money to find someone who could handle such matters, like a spirit medium, to resolve it. They tried five different groups, and none of them worked. They either burned paper and drew talismans, or chanted scriptures loudly, but it was completely useless.
I thought to myself, Old Ghost, aren’t you cultivating Buddhism to attain enlightenment? I’ve always heard you talk about your Dharma Body and divine abilities and stuff. I don’t understand it, but I figured if you could handle it, wouldn’t that be perfect? We brothers could just make this money.”
Since Gouzi and I met, he’s always called me Old Ghost because we met during a live broadcast back then. My online name was Gui Gui, and his was Gouzi, so I called him Old Dog, and he always called me Old Ghost.
Hearing this, it wasn’t hard to guess that Gouzi might not have had a very good time in the past six months, or perhaps he hadn’t earned much money at all. What he told me before, about things being okay and good, was probably just him saving face and not daring to say it directly.
I took out two Hongtashan cigarettes and offered him one.
After Gouzi lit mine.
I exhaled, chuckled, and my demeanor suddenly shifted. I said seriously:
“It’s not that I’m bragging to you, brother. I’ll tell you the truth. When I first attained enlightenment, some of the things I said might have sounded absurd.
But today, it’s not just because Big Brother has had a bit to drink and is bragging. In this world, anything that isn’t human, there’s nothing your brother can’t handle!”
Hearing this, Old Dog’s small eyes, hidden behind his gold-rimmed glasses, instantly lit up.
He knew me; I’m not the kind of person who likes to boast after a few drinks.
Since I could say something like that, it meant I could genuinely do it. I never talk about things I can’t accomplish; even when I brag, it’s only about things I’ve personally experienced.
“Holy crap, Old Ghost, this is perfect! If this works out, we’ll easily make thirty thousand. Isn’t this great? Haha, damn, once I get the money, I’ll arrange for you to go to the Grand Bathhouse by the station.”
Hearing that made me laugh.
I chuckled mischievously.
“Haha, a full service?”
“Hehe, of course, a full service!” Gouzi replied with a smirk.
Seeing Gouzi already fantasizing about it before the job was even done, I joined in the banter.
Perhaps some friends don’t understand what “a full service” means, and perhaps some do.
Let me put it this way: this “dragon” isn’t just any dragon; it’s a coiled dragon, the kind that wraps around pillars.
I’m just having a little drink and messing around with him. How could a cultivator be tempted by such things? Even if I were to go, it would certainly be to cultivate my concentration skill, not because I genuinely desired it.
It’s like the monk Fahai, played by Teacher Zhao Wenzhuo, who was tempted by the Green Snake to help him train. Unfortunately, at that time, he couldn’t stabilize himself and was “enlarged” by the Green Snake.
I definitely wouldn’t be like that. With my concentration and my strong physique, it would enlarge even without direct stimulation. But it’s okay, I can stabilize myself. I wouldn’t get enraged and beat up the Green Snake like Fahai. I would simply say thank you afterwards. This is what I call a realm.
No matter how indulgent the external appearance, the heart remains spotless. Cough cough cough.
After a few rounds of drinks and finishing the food, Big Brother and I were both dazed, and Gouzi returned to his inn.
Of course, please don’t misunderstand, everyone. He booked his own room; he didn’t stay with me.
Some might ask, why would two big guys be concerned?
This has to do with me, not Gouzi. When I was about eighteen or nineteen, a childhood friend of mine went out and got some kind of illness from somewhere.
He came to my house and stayed with me for the night. We were roughhousing, fighting over the blanket and kicking each other. After he stayed at my place for just two nights, I suddenly felt an itch in my groin, and then in my inner thighs. Damn it!
Finally, my mom took me to the doctor. The doctor said there was a one hundred percent chance my childhood friend had infected me with this disease. I said we didn’t do anything, no physical contact, we were just fighting over the blanket.
The doctor said this disease can be transmitted through touched objects, and it was definitely transmitted while fighting over the blanket.
I didn’t believe it at first. I called my childhood friend, and damn, he actually had the disease! He really screwed me over. I had to apply Chinese herbal medicine for a week to recover!
Ever since then, I’ve been extremely uncomfortable sleeping with men, and I can’t sleep if someone snores.
So, I either sleep alone or with a woman. I absolutely do not sleep with men.
Why is it okay with women? What if the woman has this disease? Damn, I don’t want to talk about this topic anymore.
