Chapter 94: Buddha-heart Ghost-hand
Suppressing the impulse to explode, I barely made it through the waiter’s cleaning.
Afterward, the waiter placed me on a movable rectangular dining table, adorned with fresh flowers and other decorations. Dipping sauces like horseradish, aged vinegar, and soy sauce were also placed beside me.
Then, he pushed me, Big Brother, out.
Pervert! This is truly perverse. Aside from not placing any food on me, Big Brother is now just like that female sushi feast from that other country.
This guy is so cool.
After pushing me to a designated dining spot, the tiger-headed strongman sat in the main seat with a greedy look on his face.
And that Hu Renchang stood by, pouring wine for the tiger.
“Tonight, I’ll eat this first, and then tonight, I’ll barbecue those five kids. Hehe, save the female one for me; Tiger Lord has a use for her.”
Holding a knife and fork, the tiger-headed strongman instructed the waiter, scraping left and right.
“Okay!”
“Then Tiger Lord, please enjoy. I will go prepare the materials needed for tonight’s barbecue.”
The tiger-headed strongman nodded with satisfaction, signaling the waiter to leave.
“Hehe, Tiger Lord, please enjoy your meal.” The waiter responded and then retreated.
Turning back, the tiger-headed strongman was about to start eating Big Brother. Not to mention anything else, I was getting anxious. His knife and fork scraped with a sizzling sound, even sparking a bit. I thought to myself, hurry up, you move, and I’ll beat you. Damn it!
I don’t know if my thoughts influenced him from afar, or if this guy was indeed hungry.
He grabbed the knife and fork, intending to start with Big Brother’s steamed bun.
Damn it!
It happened in the blink of an eye.
Just as the tiger-headed strongman’s knife and fork were about to touch Big Brother, Big Brother suddenly opened his eyes and punched him in the nose.
“Ouch!”
In pain, the tiger spirit instinctively covered his nose with his hand. Big Brother then sprang up like a carp flipping, followed by a side kick.
“Bang~!”
Sending the tiger-headed strongman flying.
Hu Renchang, who was standing there dumbfounded, was stunned by my sudden outburst, unsure of what to do for a moment.
He had helped the tiger spirit harm many people, but none of them could ever do what Big Brother did. For an ordinary person who drank the Drunken Immortal’s Slumber, it would take at least three to five days to sober up. He never expected that at such a crucial moment, I would wake up and even kick the tiger spirit away.
Seeing him standing there dumbfounded, I went up and gave him a huge slap, “Slap~!”
“What the f*** are you looking at? You damn idiot!”
The slap from me caused stars to appear all over Hu Renchang’s head, and he staggered on the ground.
These beasts, they really thought Big Brother was easy to bully?
Speaking of true immortal cultivators, aren’t they all benevolent in heart and devilish in hand?
Compassionate in heart, ruthless in means. Compassionate because if you don’t provoke me, I won’t harm you. Ruthless means that once you cross my bottom line, I’ll let you know what an enraged Vajra is!
At this moment, the tiger spirit, having reacted, showed a look of surprise. He truly didn’t expect me to suddenly erupt at this time.
After all, he had never failed with this method for so many years. In his eyes, Big Brother today had become a monster, causing him shock and confusion.
However, after quickly reacting, this guy directly transformed into his true form, a large tiger, and opened his massive jaws, intending to swallow Big Brother whole.
I thought to myself: Hmph! Little one, if Big Brother were still groggy, I might fear you a little. But now that your waiter has given Big Brother a sauna, Big Brother has long since sobered up from the scare. How can I fear you now?
“Take this punch!”
“Boom~!”
……
In the blink of an eye, I had fought with the tiger for dozens of rounds.
The powerful magic shook the entire restaurant, even damaging half of the roof.
It’s strange to say, but none of my brothers, including Sister Mingyue, woke up from their dreams due to the sound of the fight. It seems it’s better to cook for oneself in the future; at least it’s definitely safer than eating out. This is ridiculous. One should also drink less alcohol; it’s beneficial in moderation, but excessive drinking leads to trouble.
If it weren’t for my fondness for alcohol, with the abilities of my brothers, they wouldn’t be sleeping so soundly.
“Tiger Lord, I, I can’t help you with anything. I, I’ll withdraw first?”
Seeing that the fight between the tiger spirit and me was still undecided, Hu Renchang wanted to leave. Not only could he not help the tiger spirit much here, but he could also easily be accidentally injured by the spiritual power of either of us if things went wrong.
Before the tiger spirit could respond, I used a Buddha’s Light suction hand to pull him into my hand.
“Hehe, you want to leave?”
Hu Renchang’s face showed terror as he looked at me, whose face bore a Buddha-like smile, but whose grip felt like it could crush him to death.
Large beads of sweat poured down like they were free, and he quickly begged the tiger spirit for help.
“Tiger, Tiger Lord, save me!”
The tiger spirit, perhaps afraid of losing such a useful subordinate, was unwilling to.
His face contorted with rage, and he threatened me, “Let him go, and I’ll let you all leave.”
Oh? Hearing this, Big Brother was surprised. You’re saying that as if Big Brother is a wicked person!
You’re asking me to let him go and let you all leave.
I didn’t indulge him at all. Grabbing Hu Renchang by the neck, I turned his face towards Big Brother.
I said fiercely, “You wanted to leave, didn’t you? I’ll send you!”
“No!”
After Hu Renchang’s scream, Big Brother, as if crushing an ant, crushed this ghoul, Hu Renchang, into flying ash.
Cough, cough, speaking of which, it would be good enough if I didn’t eat you. You still want to eat Big Brother? I’m spoiling you!
Seeing me turn Hu Renchang into dust, the tiger spirit roared and lunged at me again.
While dodging, Big Brother casually grabbed a jar of old wine, “Gulp gulp… Ugh~… Good wine!”
Holding the wine jar in one hand, swaying, the song “Man Should Strive for Self-Improvement” by Teacher Lin Zixiang echoed in my mind.
“Deng deng, deng deng deng deng, da da, da da da da…”
“Courage like iron, bones like refined steel, a chest a thousand feet wide, vision a thousand miles long. I strive to be a good man, to be a true man, to better myself every day. A passionate man, brighter than the sun!”
Fueled by the wine, I unleashed a set of fist techniques resembling drunken boxing.
“Li Dongbin carries a pot, his drunken strength immense.”
“Bang~!”
“Han Xiangzi captures the wrist and raises the chest, drunkenly playing the flute.”
“Boom~!”
After a series of Drunken Immortal Divine Punches, the tiger spirit was pinned under me, and my electric cannons rained down like thunder, smashing into its head.
“Damn it! In ancient times, there was Wu Er who fought tigers; today, there is me, Chan Xin, who fights tigers!
I swear! I swear to your mother! Are you convinced or not?”
The tiger spirit, being smashed, had little golden stars spinning around its large head.
Its eyes began to roll upwards.
It quickly begged for mercy,
“Big, Big Brother! That’s not it, Immortal Lord, Immortal Lord, spare my life!”
“Hmm? Spare my life? You’re not going to eat me? Huh? You also said you’d barbecue my brothers! I swear to your mother! Do you believe I’ll beat you to death?”
“I believe it, I really believe it, Big Brother. Please stop!”
“Hmm? Is believing enough? Are you truly convinced in your heart?”
“Heart, convinced in heart!”
“What does that mean? Does it mean you’re not convinced in your mouth?”
“No, Big Brother, then I am convinced in my mouth!”
“What, swear to your mother, so you mean your heart is not convinced again?”
“No! Big, Big Brother, Immortal Great Lord! My heart and mouth are both convinced, I’m convinced everywhere, alright?”
Seeing the tiger spirit on the verge of tears from my beating, Big Brother felt extremely pleased. Damn it, you a monster, you want to eat me? I think you’re really messed up in the head!
Just don’t mention eating me, it’s not okay for you to eat others either! How presumptuous of you!
Who was born to be eaten by you? You shameless thing! If everyone felt they should eat others just because they are powerful, wouldn’t the world be in chaos? With someone like you, I say you should cultivate Buddhism, cultivate your compassion. If you eat everything, what will I, Big Brother, eat? Huh? Damn!
With that thought, I gave it another beating.
I had originally wanted to eat it, but this monster eats people so often that it disgusts me. I decided against it.
Then, while the tiger spirit was not paying attention, I swiftly drew out a strand of its primordial spirit and forcibly established a master-servant contract.
The guy winced in pain, wanting to resist but not daring to.
It’s no wonder, after all, who, having lived unrestrained, could accept the suffering of being bound by others?
However, he had no other choice: either follow Big Brother, reform, and become my mount, or be beaten into oblivion, dying without regret.
As the saying goes, a dog’s life is better than a noble death; even a monster wouldn’t want to die. Unable to do anything else, he had to compromise.
