Chapter 79: Demonic Cult Rogue: Holy Crap, Why Is There Another Ox?
The morning sun, like crushed starlight, slanted through the gnarled branches and leaves of the old elm tree, scattering dappled spots over the pavilion.
A breeze brushed past, and the leaves of the three old elm trees rustled and swayed, with a few early-fallen leaves spinning as they drifted down.
Chen Han opened his eyes and looked at the lifespan: 7 years, 10 months, and 24 days.
The constantly increasing lifespan made him brimming with vitality. Especially with the nourishment of true qi and medicinal cuisine, even though his lung cancer was still not cured, his physical condition was no longer weak at all, and he was stronger than ordinary people.
He put the Cloud Barrier Cauldron and the Hundred Flowers Palace Spirit Jade into the warehouse, glanced at the still leisurely You Fu, and gave him a big slap fight: “Let’s go, time to head back.”
Chen Han walked out of the pavilion, and You Fu suddenly sprang up to follow him.
When he reached his uncle’s courtyard, he had You Fu stay in the yard. Just then he saw his uncle coming out of the kitchen, so he greeted him and said, “Uncle, when you have time, help me make a bigger chamber pot.”
“What do you want that for?” Chen Lin asked in astonishment. “Don’t you have a toilet over there?”
“It’s for him.” Chen Han pointed at You Fu.
Digging a hole for him to poop in was not a long-term solution. With a big chamber pot it would be easy; taking it to the vegetable garden from his uncle’s place would save a lot of effort.
“Got it.” Chen Lin nodded, then brought up serious matters. “Xiao Han, the congee is ready inside, you can eat it yourself. I’m taking people to work on the sea of flowers. As for the specific project cost for the sea of flowers, we’ll only know after Xiao Yu finishes placing all those flower orders and we tally them up. I’ll show you then.”
“Mm.” Chen Han nodded, then went into his uncle’s kitchen and drank three bowls of congee.
As his condition improved, his appetite had also grown a lot.
Previously, when he got up in the morning, being able to drink one bowl of congee already felt very good.
After that, he began handling the dog demon meat.
As usual, he first cut off some fat and put it into the Cloud Barrier Cauldron to refine Cloud Barrier Pills.
Today he handled the hide, and cutting up the dog demon meat was clearly much easier. He quickly prepared the materials needed for the two portions of medicinal cuisine and started stewing.
The medicinal cuisine customized by Mr. Zhao and his friends, this was the last portion today.
Before long, the medicinal fragrance of the dish began to drift out.
Two lowing sounds came from outside the door, followed by footsteps, and Xiao Yu walked in. As soon as she saw him, she complained, “Senior brother, I just saw that Ming Di. He’s here to piggyback on your popularity again. He walked out holding a basin of something, no idea what he’s up to.”
“He went to collude with dog demons, obviously!” Chen Han smiled and said, “But even though he’s piggybacking, he’s also bringing us plenty of popularity. I’d guess quite a few tourists were attracted by him to come and watch the fun, right?”
“Mm, there were people following when he went out, and some really did come specifically for the spectacle.” On that point, Xiao Yu did not deny it. Then she reported the good news with a beaming face: “Senior brother, after another group came last night, our Chen Clan has a total of 40 tourists today.”
“Mm!” Chen Han nodded with a smile, then took out his mobile phone and started recording video as he walked out, saying, “A demonic cult rogue dares to come challenge at our family’s gate again. Watch me ride the Mountain Shaking Spirit Ox and lead the Mysterious Frost Lion Head Geese so that this demonic cult rogue never returns.”
He finished speaking as he stepped out of the kitchen.
You Fu had been bored in the courtyard. When he saw Chen Han come out, he quickly trotted over and lay down in front of him, looking like, get on, let’s go out and play.
This scene was all captured by the Spirit Shadow Mirror. It would surely astonish the viewers.
People always say beasts of burden this, beasts of burden that. No one told you to be this eager to be ridden. No wonder you’re a beast of burden.
Xiao Yu had naturally learned from the clan members that her senior brother was raising a calf. People in the family group had already posted videos of her senior brother riding the calf.
But she had not expected the calf to be this enthusiastic.
Watching her senior brother sit cross-legged on the calf’s back while it carried him out, she was very surprised that he could sit so steadily.
She suddenly felt a bit eager to try.
She really wanted to ride with her senior brother.
But looking at the calf’s size, one senior brother was fine, adding herself would be a bit cruel.
With that in mind, she could only follow behind out of the courtyard, heading together toward the Spirit Beast Hall.
Along the way, her surprise grew. She might understand why her senior brother wanted to raise this calf. It was so smart that it could actually understand what he said; wherever her senior brother told it to go, it went.
Soon, they reached the Spirit Beast Hall. Chen Han gave the hall’s sign a special close-up, then rode You Fu inside.
The honking of lion head geese sounded out.
You Fu was clearly curious. In a few steps he reached the fence and looked at the lion head geese inside, even mooing at one lion head goose that was standing by the fence.
The curiosity +2 attribute had obviously made him curious about these lion head geese.
The key was that lion head goose, after two moo calls, actually stretched its neck straight out and honked back at You Fu, with a “what are you looking at” attitude.
Moo!
Honk!
Moo!
Honk!
…
All right, it was like two idiots hurling insults at each other from a distance.
Xiao Yu, very thoughtful, opened the fence, and then You Fu surprisingly stopped calling.
But that lion head goose still honked at You Fu and spread its wings in an attacking stance.
The key point was, You Fu actually backed up two steps.
Chen Han could not help but smack him on the head. So in the end you’re still a cowardly ox.
But that lion head goose really deserved its countryside tough reputation, dumb and bold enough to take on anyone. Was it not afraid that if a fight started, one kick from a hoof would send it flying?
“Junior sister, help me with the filming next?” Chen Han said with a smile as he handed over his phone.
Taking the phone, Xiao Yu saw her senior brother produce a flute like a magic trick and understood his intention. She tried calling toward the lens, “Senior brother, good luck, defeat the demonic cult rogue.”
As soon as she shouted, she felt terribly embarrassed and shy.
Chen Han just smiled. “With junior sister’s support, senior brother will definitely win. Let’s go, Mysterious Frost Lion Head Geese.”
As he spoke, he raised the beast taming flute and began to play. The lion head geese instantly gathered to his side, spread their wings in unison, and guarded him, their patriarch.
Seeing this, Xiao Yu’s face was full of admiration. Every time her senior brother did something so embarrassing, he could act like it was nothing.
When would she be able to be as thick-skinned as he was?
…
Outside the Chen Clan Main Entrance, quite a few tourists had already gathered, especially those attracted by the lion heads and Ming Di, this demonic cult rogue. They had come early to wait for the Chen Family Head’s lion head goose performance.
Wang Bing was one of them. He had brought his girlfriend early in the morning. He and the other tourists looked toward where Ming Di was, wondering if this guy would get stripped again today.
Even though this kind of piggybacking behavior was disliked by most people, Ming Di was different. First, the Chen Family Head himself interacted with him. Second, the guy was truly miserable: not only stripped, but his jewels were almost destroyed, providing everyone with lots of laughs.
Looking at his outfit today—smoky eye makeup, black patterns all over his face, hair styled in a special way, and a full set of black hanfu—was he not clearly a demonic cult rogue?
So in his new video, it seemed many old fans were saying they wanted to unfollow him, joking that he had truly gone demonic, neglecting his proper work and forgetting he was a classical music flute-technique blogger.
At this moment, Ming Di was in the middle of a pack of stray dogs, holding that basin of dog food in his hands and constantly scattering it for the doggies.
Beside him, his assistant was live streaming, pointing the camera at him.
He was also acting like he had truly gone mad, addressing the stray dogs: “Honored experts of the Dog Demon Tribe, I have brought the spirit broth you requested to help you increase your strength. In today’s battle, I ask you to give your all and help me annihilate the Chen Clan.”
The assistant holding the phone was having trouble keeping a straight face. She felt like her boss had suddenly opened his Ren and Du meridians on the abstract path.
But thinking about it, it was understandable. In the past, when the boss was just a serious classical music streamer, carefully playing the flute, the live room had only a few dozen viewers at low times, and less than 200 at high times.
Look at now: early morning streaming, and there were steadily more than 1,000 viewers online.
Anyone would know which to choose.
Speaking only of rewards: before, seriously playing the flute, exhausting himself, would earn a small amount per session. Now he just said, “I am going to buy spirit broth to collude with the Dog Demon Tribe, I lack spirit stones, any fellow daoist willing to help me?” and the rewards exceeded 2,
He spent a few hundred on dog food and pocketed the rest.
She was even tempted to see if she could cosplay as a demonic cult witch, but when she thought about how her boss had only gotten this traffic by being stripped and almost losing his jewels, she shuddered.
Leaving aside being stripped, she did not have any jewels.
The live chat was already betting on whether her boss would get stripped again this time and whether his jewels would survive.
Apparently, no one had much confidence in him.
She did not know whether she should warn her boss.
At this moment, flute sound came from inside the Chen Clan.
Instantly, it drew everyone’s attention. The tourists all knew this meant the Chen Family Head was coming, the one who controlled the lion head geese with his flute.
At that moment, Ming Di looked toward the Chen Clan Main Entrance. Even the dogs happily eating heard the flute, instinctively paused, and the animals seemed oddly in sync with Ming Di.
This made the viewers in Ming Di’s live room spam “”
As if they had truly formed an alliance.
By now, Ming Di was already very practiced. He did not forget to say to the live room, “I can feel killing intent. The Chen Family Head is coming with a sky full of Mysterious Frost Lion Head Geese, and there’s also an ox… holy crap!”
As he was speaking, he saw the Chen Family Head being carried out on an ox, his eyes went wide, and he suddenly felt doomed.
Why is there an ox?
The viewers saw his expression. When the assistant turned the lens toward the Chen Clan Main Entrance, everyone understood and burst out laughing:
“Hahaha, I’m dying, there’s even an ox!”
“Ming Di, you guarded against geese, but they played an ox.”
“This is over, it’s no longer about whether your jewels survive.”
“……”
The tourists who had been waiting were of course seeing this as well. One by one, they were shocked and many raised their phones to film toward the Chen Family Head.
The Chen Family Head seemed to have leveled up and gained a mount.
Sitting cross-legged on the ox’s back, flute on his back, controlling those Mysterious Frost Lion Head Geese as he entered the scene, it was simply too cool.
The key point was, the Chen Family Head himself was very handsome.
If he put on hanfu or a daoist robe, and rode the ox backwards, it would be exactly the grand entrance an expert should have in film and television. In actual productions, they would need special effects to pull it off, and it still might not look this good.
Seeing this, Wang Bing was truly envious.
He was imagining how impressive he would look if he were the one sitting cross-legged on that ox.
“I suddenly find the Chen Family Head really handsome!” his girlfriend exclaimed in admiration.
Wang Bing felt uncomfortable. Was it okay to praise another man’s looks right in front of him?
Very soon, Chen Han had guided the Mysterious Frost Lion Heads close. He dismounted the ox and looked at Ming Di with playful eyes. “Demonic cult rogue, prepare to die!”
Ming Di opened his mouth, on the verge of tears.
Brother, you didn’t say you had an ox.
This was not in the plan.
In the next moment, he heard the Chen Family Head play the formation musical notes, followed by the charge musical notes, and saw the lion head geese charge toward him and the stray dogs.
He did not hesitate. He immediately flung all the dog food in the basin toward the lion head geese.
In that instant, as if chasing the dog food, the stray dogs instinctively pounced. Then they realized what was happening, their fur bristled, and with barks they clashed once again with the lion heads.
Terrifying energy collided, sand flew, stones shot through the air. With every clash between spirit beasts and dog demons, it seemed the ground cracked with fissures.
“Chen Family Head, this time I will not fail again.” Ming Di could only grit his teeth and step forward, glaring at the ox.
It wasn’t really going to charge, was it?
But at this point he could only gamble. He hastily took out a jade-green flute and put it to his lips. This was the Jade Bamboo Demonic Flute he had talked about in his video, a magical artifact.
The same kind of flute sound as Chen Han’s rang out. Since he claimed in the video he would seize control of the Mysterious Frost Lion Head Geese, he had to at least put on a show.
But in the next moment, his flute sound stopped and his eyes went wide.
Moo!
The ox actually bellowed and really charged at him.
“Oh come on…” Ming Di’s eyes went wide. Terrified, he turned and ran, with the ox giving chase.
In an instant, the image of a Mountain Shaking Spirit Ox trampling a demonic cult rogue appeared.
Ming Di’s assistant did not dare hesitate and immediately turned the camera that way, letting all the viewers burst into laughter. The scene they had imagined was now real. Then they saw Ming Di repeat the same mistake as last time: the hem of his hanfu was too long.
And he fell again.
This time, everyone was shocked.
This was bad. Would he get hurt?
It was still an ox. Whether it rammed or stepped on him, Ming Di would be finished.
Fortunately, everyone saw the ox stop right in front of Ming Di, staring down at him from close range.
Ming Di could feel the ox’s breath on his face and was so frightened he did not dare move.
In the next moment, he realized the Chen Family Head’s flute tune had changed. Then he saw the stray dogs already fleeing in panic, running without looking back.
These dog demons had no loyalty at all.
A group of white figures rushed toward him: the lion head geese.
Terrified, he clutched downward with both hands to shield his jewels.
Honk honk! Honk honk!
In an instant, the lion head geese surrounded Ming Di and pounced on him.
Chen Han, meanwhile, reached the goose-dog battlefield and casually put a piece of exploded dog demon meat into the warehouse.
Just then, Ming Di’s shrill shout rang out: “Holy crap, it’s you, you goose, what did my jewels ever do to you…”
…
（There’s more tonight!）
