Chapter 45: Mother and Son Meet, Unrecognized
This was the first time I saw him shed tears.
I had always thought that such a resolute man would always be strong. He was the pride of the Cheng Residence, a newly promoted high official in the Ministry of Revenue, and Minister Zhang’s intended successor. He had studied literature and practiced martial arts since childhood, read the books of sages, and was knowledgeable about current affairs. He possessed a strong physique honed by martial arts.
He was like a boat, carrying the hopes of too many people.
For several days, I traveled north by sea, and returned from the great Yangtze River. My heart is like a compass needle, it will not rest until it points south. I can imagine how lonely he must have been standing in the indifference of the Imperial Court.
He tried his best to secure the opportunity to inspect the disaster-stricken areas. It was precisely because of this “unconventional” act that the people trapped in the flood received some attention from the higher authorities. The Monarch sitting on the Golden Throne finally noticed the suffering populace.
I leaned against him and said, “Everything will be alright, it will all be alright.”
He reached out and placed his hand on my still flat abdomen, saying, “Thanks to Madam’s blessings, I am about to become a father. From now on, Madam, please do not overexert yourself. Regarding the Imperial Palace painter’s duties, it would be best to request an imperial decree to temporarily resign.”
I said, “No need. I only have to be on duty three times a month, it’s not a big deal. If I were to stay at home all the time, I would also be bored.”
He thought for a moment, “Alright. As you wish.”
Then, he asked again, “What book was Madam reading earlier?”
“Just some leisure reading. In recent years, there have been many more storybooks on the market than in the previous dynasty.”
I smiled and told him the general story of 《Jade Hall Spring’s Misfortune Meets Husband》.
After listening, he said, “That Young Master Wang is not a good person either. Why did he squander all his money in the brothel, get stripped and left with nothing? He disgraced the dignity of scholars and implicated Miss Su. Even if such a person became an official later, he would not be a good official. I imagine he would still be swayed by other beauties and lack self-control. Preventing disaster in advance will prevent future heartbreak. A proper man should not neglect his family and country, nor his beloved.”
I smiled, “But Miss Su willingly did so herself. The whole world emphasizes parental orders and arranged marriages. Only these two pursued a free marriage, which should also be considered a brave act.”
He shook his head, “This kind of bravery is not called bravery, it’s called selfishness. To disregard one’s parents is to be no better than an animal. Would parents harm their own children? A person who lives in this world, having lost filial piety and righteousness, even if they gain love, are they truly human? What is the point?”
I raised my eyes and looked at him.
The candlelight and red gauze cast flickering shadows on his face.
I suddenly understood his previous choices. A man like him would never, and could never, betray me.
He has a clear sense of right and wrong, and strong self-control. From the moment he, disguised, learned that I had married his spirit tablet, he had already decided that I was his wife.
He held me and rested his head on my hair, saying, “Madam, please be careful when reading in the future. Ask Xiao Yin to light the lamp brighter, so as not to strain your eyes.”
I suddenly asked, “Second Master, a few days ago, I heard Eldest Sister-in-law say that an old minister in the Imperial Court gifted you a singing girl.”
He said, “Eldest Sister-in-law talks too much. I already refused. I didn’t need to tell you.”
At midnight, the wind finally picked up outside.
It blew away much of the heat.
I reached out and smoothed the rolled-up red gauze curtain.
He said, “Madam, you are pregnant, please do not overthink. I only tell you that I have no intention of taking concubines. In this life, a virtuous wife and a harmonious family are enough.”
I nestled in his arms and fell asleep with him.
His hand remained on my abdomen all night, not withdrawing.
The next morning, early, he packed a few personal belongings and set off, not even having time to eat breakfast.
I saw him off and stuffed a few flatbreads and a few hard-boiled eggs into his hands.
I said, “Second Master, the houses that were flooded are not structurally sound. When you pass by, please be careful not to let the roof collapse on you. Do not linger outside for too long. Once you have figured things out, come back.”
“I know.”
He smiled, reached out, and stroked my cheek, then turned and left.
I leaned against the doorframe and watched until the horse carriage was far away and disappeared from my sight before returning to my courtyard.
During my pregnancy, my appetite was always poor, and I suffered greatly from morning sickness.
I couldn’t eat anything.
In just a few days, looking in the mirror, I had become much thinner.
The Old Madam sent someone to hire a chef from Shandong to cook many of my hometown dishes, but I still had no appetite.
On the seventh day of the seventh month, Feng Gao came to visit me once.
Seeing how much weight I had lost, he was worried and said, “Elder Sister, what do you feel like eating? No matter how difficult it is, even if it requires the imperial chef, I can get it for you.”
I shook my head.
“Elder Sister used to love sweet sesame noodles when she was little, and also, and also pancakes with scallions… I’ll go buy them.” He racked his brains trying to remember.
I then said, “I remember in Dongchang Prefecture during the summer, there was a small wild melon, the size of a fingernail, with a taste that was sour with a hint of bitterness, which suited my appetite.”
Upon hearing this, he flew away.
In less than two days, he returned with a large box of small wild melons.
He eagerly said, “Elder Sister, please try them quickly, is it the taste you remember?”
I picked one up, wiped it, and put it in my mouth. The taste on my lips and tongue was familiar and comforting.
I asked, “Where did you get these? From Dongchang Prefecture to the Capital City, it takes at least four or five days by canal transport.”
He tilted his face up, as if waiting for praise like a child, “I wouldn’t take the usual canal transport. Fruits and vegetables are different from other goods; if they are transported for several days, the taste will spoil, and they won’t be fresh. What if Elder Sister eats something bad? I sent messages to all the post stations, using swift horses, treating it as an urgent military dispatch, and had them delivered all the way.”
I poked his forehead with my finger, “You are not allowed to do this again in the future. Are military dispatches a game!”
“What’s there to be afraid of? I don’t care what others think. The reputation of the Eastern Depot is already bad anyway. Let it be bad. I just want to annoy them.”
He smiled and sat down beside me, “If Elder Sister is well, and Pea is well, then I am well.”
A faint sound of footsteps approached, and Madam Qin came to find me, calling out, “Sang Yu—”
Feng Gao’s smile was still on his lips. He saw her unexpectedly and did not avoid her.
Madam Qin stared blankly at Feng Gao, making him quite uncomfortable. Seeing that he was about to get angry, I quickly interjected, “You are very busy with your official duties, you should go.”
He remained silent.
Madam Qin suddenly blurted out something.
I didn’t hear clearly and asked, “What did you say?”
She continued to look at Feng Gao and asked, “Eunuch, how old are you? Where are your parents?”
These questions were clearly abrupt for Feng Gao.
I nudged Feng Gao, signaling him to leave quickly. He frowned and withdrew.
After he left, Madam Qin said to me with a sigh, “The layered waves ripple, and distant mountains lie across. A smile can topple a city. This is a poem I recited just now. Taiyue gave it to me in the back garden more than twenty years ago. Sang Yu, do you remember I told you that the Eunuch’s face looked somewhat familiar?”
I vaguely said, “Have a wild melon.”
She continued to herself, “I’ve been thinking about it for days, but I couldn’t recall where I had seen him. Just now, when he smiled, I suddenly remembered—”
“He doesn’t look like others, he looks like myself when I was young,” she said, as if suddenly enlightened.
I remained silent.
She said, “Sang Yu, don’t you believe me? Before I was married, I had a small portrait, which is still kept in Yangzhou. When you see it, you will know that what I said is true.”
“Think about it, in the portraits of court ladies from ancient times, there might be one or two figures that resemble him. I am a painter, I understand this best. This is a common occurrence,” I said nonchalantly.
She pondered for a long time, nodded, picked up a small wild melon, and put it in her mouth.
“Sang Yu, what you said makes sense. I was too hasty. I am not usually hasty, but for some reason, I felt as if I were possessed just now. Please don’t laugh.”
I sat with her under the eaves.
The wind lifted the hem of her skirt.
“The heart of the cloud has no self, and the self has no heart of the cloud,” she murmured softly.
Layered waves ripple, and distant mountains lie across. A smile can topple a city. At this moment, I knew that Madam Qin was living in past memories, not yet awakened. The tranquil her in the Qin Residence was not her true self. She had always been the girl who could topple a city with a smile in the back garden twenty years ago.
Leave your smile for yesterday.
Leave your memories for tonight.
It wasn’t until half a month later that Cheng Huaishi returned to the capital.
Covered in dust and dirt, without time to tidy himself, he went to see His Majesty.
He wrote a memorial of tens of thousands of characters and presented it to the Emperor.
In the Imperial Court, he presented the white bones he had brought back from the disaster area, which had clearly been boiled.
He kowtowed until his head bled and reported to His Majesty that the disaster-stricken areas were filled with starving corpses, to the point where people were resorting to cannibalism. If the Imperial Court did not intervene, Heaven would not bear witness.
Some ministers said, “Minister Cheng may be making a mountain out of a molehill. Only one city is affected, while the rest of the world is not. His Majesty is building seventy-two Taoist temples for the welfare of all people and the protection of the nine provinces. Which is more important, the people of one city, or the people of the entire world?”
Others chimed in, “The ancient saying goes, people are divided into noble and humble, and land is divided into large and small. This has been the case since ancient times. How can the joy of His Majesty be disturbed by the fortune or misfortune of the common people? His Majesty is the Son of Heaven, and the Son of Heaven’s wisdom nourishes all beings. Are you implying that His Majesty is not as intelligent as you, or not as thoughtful as you?”
Cheng Huaishi said, “You are all well-read and hold positions in the court. The common people call you ‘parents’ officials.’ Is there any reason for parents to see their children die?”
He cupped his hands and said to the throne, “This minister pleads with his blood for the ten thousand people, begging His Majesty to grant disaster relief.”
After speaking, he was about to dash himself against a pillar.
The situation escalated.
His Majesty ordered people to restrain him.
Minister Zhang, who was still recuperating at home, heard the news from a familiar eunuch and rushed over.
Under these circumstances, His Majesty agreed to the “disaster relief” matter.
However, after the court session, he kept Cheng Huaishi behind and implicitly instructed him to control the amount of money. It was not yet the autumn harvest season, and the taxes for the year had not yet been collected. More than half of the Taoist temples had already begun construction, and it was imperative that the construction of the temples not be affected by the national treasury’s funds. Otherwise, the gods would descend with punishment, affecting the destiny of the Great Ming.
Cheng Huaishi agreed, and only then did His Majesty allow him to proceed with disaster relief.
However, after a month, he still exceeded the court’s budget. He bore the pressure from all sides, acted first and reported later, and only returned after all the disaster victims had been resettled.
His Majesty’s Taoist temples were only half-built, and construction was halted.
Upon hearing the report, His Majesty flew into a thunderous rage.
At this moment, the situation suddenly took a turn—
