Chapter 21: Hell Joke Enthusiast
The shouting echoed in the empty lobby, sounding extremely ethereal.
Without moonlight, the room was very dim, making it hard to see anything. Jiang Ce took out his mobile phone to provide light.
He shone the light around, then looked down and discovered that the ground was already covered with a thick layer of dust, to the point where the original floor could no longer be seen.
Amid this dust, there were many chaotic footprints, but these footprints were also covered with fresh dust again. Based on their varying depths, Jiang Ce judged that people had indeed come here at different times in the past years.
So far, everything matched those urban legends except that he hadn’t seen any ghosts and monsters yet.
Before setting up the Soul Soothing magic array, Jiang Ce planned to first tour the entire Western-style building. After all, the night was still long, and there was no rush at this moment. Compared to that, he was more curious about the history of this building.
At this time, Jiang Ce was standing in the lobby on the first floor. Part of the lobby was semi-open, so looking up directly revealed the ceiling on the second floor. Directly opposite was an hourglass-shaped staircase leading to the second floor, narrow in the middle and wider at both ends.
The carpet laid on the staircase had turned black over the passage of time, making its material indistinguishable, but it was enough to prove the wealth of the Western-style building’s owner and the luxury of the building itself.
The upper part of the lobby should originally have had a chandelier, but now only a chain remained hanging from the ceiling.
Jiang Ce did not choose to go up the stairs but instead walked toward the area behind them.
The Western-style building covered a large area, roughly three or four hundred square meters, so there were many rooms inside.
However, most rooms could no longer be identified for their original purpose. Aside from the load-bearing walls, many walls had been hollowed out in the middle and connected together, and these rooms were filled with makeshift simple single beds.
Looking at this absurd layout, Jiang Ce couldn’t help but complain: “If there was some infectious disease, wouldn’t this lead to cross-infection?”
The iron frames of these single beds still had many dark brown spots, unclear whether they were bloodstains left by the wounded here back then or traces of rust.
There were also quite a few unremoved broken stones, bricks, and dirt in the corners. Jiang Ce kicked at them with his foot, but the magical scenario he hoped for—”a skull rolling out from the gap”—did not occur.
Jiang Ce roughly counted, and there were no fewer than a hundred such beds on the first floor, and this was likely after some cleanup; the situation back then might have been even worse.
Perhaps those with less severe injuries were dragged to the corridors or even outside.
Going up to the second floor, Jiang Ce was surprised to find that it was much cleaner here, with rooms largely preserved in their original state. Unlike the first floor, no room was crammed full of beds; at most, there were two or three.
Jiang Ce speculated that back then, the first floor was probably the treatment area for ordinary wounded, while the second floor might have been for officers or severely wounded who needed a better environment.
After looking around, there was still nothing noteworthy, except for one room with a window that had severe damage marks, which Jiang Ce found somewhat interesting.
The floor and walls here were charred black, as if something had exploded.
What Jiang Ce found amusing was that in the corner, there was a patch of wall that wasn’t charred black but yellowish-brown instead. Most intriguingly, this mark formed a solid “H” shape at the bottom.
It was like on muddy ground after rain, a car speeding by and splashing a large amount of mud. At that moment, an unlucky person happened to pass by; the mud first splattered on him, then splashed onto the wall behind the unlucky person, leaving a human-shaped blank space.
Jiang Ce curiously scraped at that area with his hand and found that, if not looked at closely, it was hard to notice that the yellowish-brown substance wasn’t actually part of the wall but some kind of hardened, strange material that had dried.
After a moment’s thought, Jiang Ce roughly understood what had happened: probably a grenade or something was thrown into this room, and at that exact time, an unlucky person was here, got blown into meat mud, and splattered onto the wall, sticking there for a century.
Jiang Ce compared the shape of this area, squatted down, leaned close to the wall, and raised both hands, finding that they matched the imprint perfectly.
“Tch, but why is it squatting? Could it be because there were no legs? That doesn’t make sense either—how did he get off the bed without legs? Or was this unlucky person squatting here jerking off at the time?”
Jiang Ce was amused by his own speculation and burst out laughing: “This fits my image of a Japanese person perfectly.”
But on second thought, it felt off: “But why was his first reaction to raise both hands instead of seeking cover? Or does this Japanese person actually have some Gallic blood?”
If merit had independent consciousness, then the merit on Jiang Ce might pack its bags and curse as it left this bizarre man who casually invoked a hellish realm with his mouth—but unfortunately, merit had no independent consciousness, and Jiang Ce had none on him either.
After touring the entire Western-style building, Jiang Ce felt utterly bored. Aside from the world-famous painting—”Gallic-blooded Japanese soldier jerking off, human body art”—there were no other interesting discoveries.
So Jiang Ce returned to the first floor, cleared a clean area on the lobby floor, and then began setting up the Soul Soothing magic array.
Actually, while understanding the Soul Soothing Technique, Jiang Ce had discovered that many parts subtly aligned with the operational paths of power from merit conversion. By making slight arrangements at certain specific nodes, seamless switching between magic arrays could be achieved.
In essence, the Soul Soothing magic array was just one array, and the various so-called arrays for different ghosts and monsters were merely variations of that single array. Ordinary people couldn’t comprehend its mysteries, so Chen Mian had always set up different arrays.
When Chen Mian misjudged the type of ghosts and monsters, the array would fail, which made Jiang Ce think the Soul Soothing Technique was unstable and low-value.
But in reality, its variations were so profound that even at eighth rank, one might not comprehend them—only someone at seventh rank like Jiang Ce could.
Of course, he didn’t know that this Soul Soothing Technique wasn’t even the original version but the most perfected iteration that Tide Old Man had periodically improved based on his advancing strength.
This was also why Tide Old Man could roughly tell that Jiang Ce was no ordinary person—non-Jianghu sorcerers could never discover those so-called nodes, let alone focus on them.
Of course, Jiang Ce was completely unaware of all this and had no knowledge of the cultivation world. He was simply planning to lie low and develop, then show off in front of the old abbot after reaching half-immortal, pulling off a classic case of the lowly challenging the high.
Then coolly say: “Thirty years east of the river, thirty years west—before, you ignored me; now, you can’t reach my level!”
He harbored no malice, just purely thought it would feel pretty great.
While secretly reveling in his mind, Jiang Ce didn’t realize that what he truly wanted was just the old abbot’s recognition.
Amid his fantasies, Jiang Ce finished setting up the Soul Soothing magic array encompassing the entire lobby. He then took out the wooden fish he always carried, bared his stark white teeth, and let out a villainous laugh:
“Jie jie jie! If there really are no ghosts, I’ll jerk off all over every bed here until it’s sticky, gooey, blissfully toe-curling absolute perfection!”
Thump, thump, thump.
As the sound of the wooden fish rang out, Jiang Ce chanted the Ksitigarbha Sutra, his gaze growing increasingly serious.
In a certain instant, Jiang Ce suddenly discovered that dense black shadows had truly appeared on the Western-style building’s walls.
“They’re here.”
The next moment, whimpering, wailing, groaning, and howling cries erupted together.
The originally silent Western-style building was suddenly filled with a desperate atmosphere.
Black miasma visibly surged out from the walls, countless faces emerging on the wall surfaces, as if desperately trying to squeeze out, break free from their bonds, and constantly attempting to do so.
Finally, the first ghosts and monsters in tattered yellow military uniforms tumbled out from the second-floor wall, then twisted as they struggled up from the ground, limping slowly toward Jiang Ce.
Then the second, the third…
Jiang Ce’s gaze grew increasingly grave, because he discovered that among them were not only ordinary ghosts but also quite a few ninth- and eighth-rank vengeful spirits, and even one vengeful spirit whose theoretical strength matched his own at seventh rank, tearing at the obstructing ghosts while charging toward Jiang Ce at greater speed.
Theoretically, Jiang Ce feared none of these ghosts and monsters individually, but their numbers were overwhelming.
A rough glance showed dozens of ghosts, over a dozen eighth- and ninth-rank vengeful spirits, and one seventh-rank vengeful spirit.
Jiang Ce took a deep breath, stomped his foot fiercely, and shouted the Soul Soothing Technique incantation. To his great surprise, the Soul Soothing Technique failed to activate!
Facing the increasingly approaching ghosts and monsters with his retreat blocked, Jiang Ce grew anxious. But just then, a flash of insight struck his mind. He shouted the command again, not forgetting to infuse it with the strongest malice he could muster, roaring:
“You lowlifes all die for me! Damn it!”
The next moment, the magic array emitted a blindingly radiant light!
