Chapter 41: The Empress Dowager Is Just Too Perfect
Teacher Huang: “……”
He had no time to deal with Chi Ye right now. Seeing Teacher Yang Zi and Teacher Lu separate, with the latter worried about Lin Jingyi and rushing over first.
Teacher Huang was of course concerned about his own artist’s situation and hurried to catch up.
“Are you okay? Why are you foaming at the mouth?”
“Face, face, someone come adjust Jingyi’s features slightly!”
“Why does this mouth look like Nike? Don’t move recklessly!”
“Tanghulu dropped!”
While speaking, the tanghulu in Lin Jingyi’s mouth fell out. She opened her eyes, looked at the circle of people surrounding her, blinked her eyes extremely uncoordinatedly, then turned her head away. Without seeing her do anything, when she turned back, her mouth was no longer crooked.
“It’s from keeping her mouth open too long, saliva flowed out. It’s fine, it’s fine.”
Seeing this, everyone breathed a sigh of relief.
They then remembered the even heavier hitter from earlier: Teacher Yang Zi PK Teacher Lu.
“Hmph!”
Teacher Lu reacted, snorted coldly, waved to summon his assistant—Jian Ni didn’t have an assistant following, but aside from Jin Xia who deliberately didn’t let her team follow, and Chi Ye who was too poor to have anyone, who didn’t have an “hidden” assistant in private?
He pulled out his spare hairpiece, put it on, then turned back to look at Teacher Yang Zi, his face even darker.
—Teacher Lu was famously good-tempered, but also famously cared about his image.
Nearly fifty years old, yet he dieted regularly to cut oil, which said it all.
The “ugly state” Teacher Yang Zi exposed earlier was really too repulsive!
And at this moment, Teacher Yang Zi also knew he had offended Teacher Lu just now.
Though he regretted it in his heart, if it happened again, he felt he would still do the same.
That was a Heavenly Bead!
“No, I need to go to the hospital, it hurts too much. To the hospital, no more recording!”
Teacher Yang Zi immediately unleashed the ultimate move he learned from his former senior friend Wheat Emperor, covering his mouth and wailing miserably.
Program Team: “……”
“I need to go to the hospital to get treated too.”
Teacher Huang’s “injury” wasn’t serious, just a decayed tooth that was about to fall out anyway, but just in case, he needed to go to the hospital to handle it.
“Alright.”
Director Li was very helpless, but “injured” was human nature.
Here, Teacher Yang Zi and Teacher Huang, accompanied by staff and their own assistants, headed to the nearby hospital.
On the other side, Chi Ye returned to his stall, saw the live broadcast resume, and couldn’t help sighing: “《Jian Ni》 big stage, come if you dare.”
“They have to keep broadcasting, as expected of the most real program!”
There was no movement beside him. He turned his head and saw “Little Raccoon” Teacher Shi already focused back on “work.”
What surprised him was that Empress Dowager was also meticulously making her own tanghulu.
Even after such a “lively” incident earlier, she only glanced a few times at first, and once she saw it was fine, she shrank back to tinker with her own things.
What form was this Empress Dowager in?
Curious, Chi Ye walked over for a look and his eyes lit up. He praised: “So pretty.”
“Mm~”
Jin Xia looked up, saw it was Chi Ye, narrowed her beautiful peach blossom eyes, and hummed coyly: “Teacher Chi, praise me more, I like you praising me!”
Chi Ye: “……”
“How did you carve this?”
Unusually, he didn’t retort but asked curiously.
Because the “tanghulu” in Empress Dowager’s hand was indeed carved too beautifully.
Each plump strawberry clearly specially selected by Empress Dowager had now become rose shapes, with petals blooming vividly, and even in the details, a few “rose flowers” had cute “dew drops” dotted on them.
Too pretty. From a distance, he even thought they were real rose flowers.
“What’s so hard about this?” Jin Xia raised her white tender swan neck and said coquettishly: “I’ve studied sculpture, Teacher Chi. Don’t talk about strawberries, I can carve other things too!”
Chi Ye nodded repeatedly hearing this.
Yes, that’s it, a bunch of “useless” skills—this was Empress Dowager.
He asked curiously: “Besides sculpture, what else have you studied?”
“Mm…” Empress Dowager thought and boasted proudly: “Way too many, like flower arranging… classical music performance… ballet… mm, and tea art, I know them all!”
Okay, confirmed for the blacklist.
Not a single one he wanted.
As expected of you!
Empress Dowager was just too well-rounded!
While Chi Ye was thinking this, he heard from the stall opposite, a middle-aged man walk over and ask: “How much for tanghulu?”
A customer came?!
The only two still “alive,” Teacher Lu and Lin Jingyi, looked up at the middle-aged uncle, who looked somewhat familiar. The former enthusiastically: “Six yuan a skewer… but we haven’t made any yet. Can you wait a bit?”
The uncle glanced at his “weird” styling.
It was different from before with the new hairpiece, a bit odd: “Have to wait? Then I won’t buy!”
With that, he walked away with hands behind his back.
Program Team: “Refused customer, deduct 10 yuan revenue!”
Teacher Lu: “?”
“No way, this guy looks like from the program team!”
Chi Ye spotted the key point.
He had already recognized this middle-aged man as clearly a big brother photographer from some crew.
Program team stirring trouble?
Teacher Lu reacted too, glaring angrily: “Director Li, be a person!”
Director Li’s face unchanged: “They are all customers now!”
Everyone: “……”
The group finally understood: the program team was determined to create some program effect, messing around.
“Reminder to everyone, besides us, there will be many real customers. Hope you do well in ‘food service.’”
Director Li finished and said no more.
“Teacher Chi!”
Empress Dowager, who had been focused on carving, looked up, waved the six exquisite pretty “rose flowers” in her hand: “I’m done!”
Then she reached out, handing them to Chi Ye, and said coyly: “Giving you little flowers!”
Chi Ye was stunned.
“Teacher Chi?”
Chi Ye came back to his senses: “……Not coated in sugar yet!”
“Oh oh, right!”
Empress Dowager patted her little forehead and trotted over to Shi Daifu to coat the sugar.
“Pretty is pretty, but this efficiency is too low.”
Chi Ye rubbed his chin. Not to mention Teacher Lu’s group, who had already “made” a batch of tanghulu, even Shi Daifu had made the first batch.
Empress Dowager had just finished carving one skewer.
Truly all about refinement.
“That flower looks good, I want to buy it.”
At this time, another customer walked over, eyeing Jin Xia’s “rose flower” at first glance.
Chi Ye glanced at him and instantly recognized him as an apprentice from the program team’s photography crew, dressed like a student.
“Ten yuan.”
Customer: “?”
Shocked: “So expensive?! Over there it’s only six yuan!”
Chi Ye reasoned: “Look at this flower shape, does the other side have tanghulu like this?”
Customer: “……”
Pausing, receiving Director Li’s eye signal, he immediately put on a aggrieved look: “Bro, I’m a student, don’t have that much money. Can you make it cheaper?”
Chi Ye slanted him a look: “Student? Embarrassed, even beasts won’t do.”
Customer: “……”
He felt like he took ten thousand critical hits!
“Chi Ye group, ‘abusing customer,’ deduct 10 yuan revenue!”
Director Li first laughed out loud, then put on a serious face.
“Only deduct 10 yuan? Shouldn’t it be a billion?”
Chi Ye sarcastically remarked, then turned back to watch Jin Xia coat the sugar.
Director Li: “……Insulted program team, deduct another 10 yuan!”
Bullet comments in the live broadcast room full of haha.
「So satisfying! Only Hu Ye would say that!」
「Laughing to death, even beasts won’t do, that little mouth is too vicious.」
「What exactly happened earlier? How are two people missing?」
「Where’s Teacher Yang Zi? Where’s Teacher Huang?」
「Why did Teacher Lu change hairstyle? Can he one-click change outfit outside?」
「Audience at the live performance who watched say they “fought” earlier!」
「……」
Chi Ye group’s live broadcast was relatively smooth. Though briefly off-air earlier, many people at the live performance, quite a few had already posted the dramatic Jian Ni incident online.
Though the program team and each team tried to suppress hot searches, those in the know could check and find out—it couldn’t be hidden.
And in just half a day of broadcasting, Jian Ni had two abstract incidents in a row: once Si Mou caught, once grabbing “tanghulu” at the live performance. Jian Ni’s popularity was visibly skyrocketing.
Hospital emergency department.
Teacher Yang Zi on IV drip, casually scrolling Weibo, saw this “star journey brilliant” scene.
His left cheek now swollen hugely, with an ice pack bought by his assistant applied, scrolling Weibo while grinning foolishly.
Teacher Huang beside him felt a wave of bad luck.
Teacher Yang Zi ignored it, staring at a marketing account expose on the hot search term “Jian Ni live performance inside story, Teacher Yang Zi disappears.”
His little eyes darted, landing on his hand with the IV drip.
Flap!
He suddenly stood up, the IV bag on the stand swaying.
Teacher Huang jumped: “What the hell are you doing?!”
Teacher Yang Zi resolute: “I want to go back and record the program!”
Teacher Huang: “?”
Bluntly: “Are you stupid? Looking like this, and go back to record?”
Teacher Yang Zi pouted: “You don’t get it, in this traffic-is-king era, this is how you get popularity!”
Teacher Huang initially didn’t understand.
But when Teacher Yang Zi stood, and the assistant went to call a nurse to remove the needle, he hurriedly stopped: “Hey! Hey! Don’t call! Go just like this! Go record with the IV drip!”
Assistant: “?”
Idiot?
Of course, he definitely wouldn’t say it outright, just tactfully gestured at Teacher Yang Zi’s face: “This… inconvenient, one hand isn’t enough.”
“Not enough?” Teacher Yang Zi directly tossed the ice pack, exposing his pig-head face to the air, grabbed the IV bag: “No problem, now it’s enough!”
Everyone: “……”
“Fuck, what kind of idiot is this, can you act normal?!”
Teacher Huang broke defense.
He originally wasn’t badly hurt, came over really just to slack off, wait for Chi Ye them to sell out tanghulu, then go back indoors to record.
But he didn’t expect Teacher Yang Zi to go this far for popularity.
Go record with IV drip!
He actually could do it!
“Outside is minus twenty degrees, you go out with drip, infusing what? Air?! Teacher Yang Zi tell me honestly, did you have a fever as a kid?!”
“Oh?”
Teacher Yang Zi paused, reacted, slapped his thigh: “Right! How did I forget that…”
“Assistant, assistant, swap the medicine in the IV for alcohol, alcohol won’t freeze!”
Teacher Huang: “?!”
Retard?!
Of course, Teacher Yang Zi wasn’t a retard. His next words: “Also have the nurse remove the needle, turn off the IV tube, alcohol can’t be infused! Cover my hand with medical tape, fine. It’ll warm up by noon, outsiders won’t see!”
Assistant: “……”
“Got it, right away!”
Teacher Yang Zi’s team had extreme “execution.” Under the nurses’ dumbfounded idiot looks, Teacher Yang Zi swapped to alcohol bought by assistant, finished “makeup and styling,” and strode out energetically.
“You used all the tricks on yourself!”
Teacher Huang saw Teacher Yang Zi about to leave, hurriedly chased: “Wait for me!”
“?” Teacher Yang Zi surprised: “Why do you always compete with me?!”
Teacher Huang: “……”
Unbearable: “Compete with your horse! If you go and I don’t, won’t I get trashed?!”
Teacher Yang Zi: “……You have no manners.”
Teacher Huang just nodded, said nothing.
“Whatever, come if you want.” Teacher Yang Zi raised his needled hand, mouth crooked: “This time, the IV drip follows my command!”
Teacher Huang still silent, just staring at his back, eyes gradually sinister.
Fine fine fine, wanna play like this?
Then nobody plays!
……
Teacher Yang Zi was full of old artist’s composure, but he was right on one point.
—Now was the traffic-is-king era.
Market, live performance.
Chi Ye was now feeling the charm of a top streamer.
Shi Daifu had made the second batch of tanghulu, Empress Dowager carved two skewers of “rose flowers,” inserted on the display, dazzling array, full of color, aroma, and taste.
Plus after they arrived at the live performance, taking off headgear while eating tanghulu, hot search hanging high, everyone knew Xia Xia was recording here today, visitors endless.
In contrast, Teacher Lu’s side, though some went for photos, since they hadn’t made a batch of “successful” tanghulu yet, nothing to sell.
“Xiao Ming Ge~ Let me help you, look you’re sweating from exhaustion.”
After Teacher Yang Zi duo left, Teacher Lu didn’t let Lin Jingyi work anymore, very macho taking it all, already panting from fatigue.
Hearing, he smiled slightly, in his magnetic voice: “No problem girl, I’m not tired, that’s not sweat, just a bit of oil.”
Lin Jingyi moved, hands clasped to chest: “Xiao Ming Ge, you’re so manly, too masculine!”
Chi Ye opposite collecting money till his mouth wouldn’t close, shook head seeing: “Look how Lin Jingyi coaxed Teacher Lu, coaxed into Teacher Yang Zi!”
Teacher Lu looked up, waved at Chi Ye: “Chi Ye, we will definitely win!”
Then signaled he wasn’t tired, flexed his biceps, confident but evil-charming smile in others’ eyes.
Chi Ye stopped: “Teacher Lu, prohibit uglifying males!”
Teacher Lu: “?”
Chi Ye continued persuading: “If not, come to our side, defect to us. Tomorrow go play, bring you and Jingyi girl.”
Teacher Lu’s eyes lit up, but quickly shook head, confident smile: “Just watch, tomorrow we’ll go play!”
“Old people are great, planning next life’s stuff early.”
“……”
While they spoke, a commotion came from the program team nearby.
Then, a middle-aged man with head swollen like a pig head, one hand high holding IV drip, walked over.
Beside him, Teacher Huang sighing at the program team crowd.
“?!”
Chi Ye shocked: “Who let it out again?!”
“Make way, Teacher Yang Zi ran from hospital to work sick!”
Teacher Huang sarcastically said.
Teacher Yang Zi smiled slightly, waved: “No problem no problem, minor injury, just on drip, can persist.”
Teacher Huang: “Mm, Teacher Yang Zi is so dedicated!”
Chi Ye caught the insinuation, glanced at Teacher Yang Zi’s sneaky delighted expression, suddenly realized: “No wonder the toilet was clogged this morning, turns out Teacher Yang Zi’s dedication filled it!”
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